Connecting with my Inner Tasha Tudor?

Posted by Barbara Techel

We had a summer storm go through around 9 pm last night. At one point there was such a loud crack I sat straight up in bed. The first thought that ran through my mind when I heard it was, “Wake up America!” Not an unusual thought with all that has been unfolding in our world which has been so prevalent on my mind.

After that loud crack, I expected to hear sirens thinking surely something was hit, but fortunately, no sirens sounded.

But this morning there was evidence of the thrashing the trees took with many branches down that I saw on my early morning walk. Plus the many branches that fell from trees in our yard too.

I actually enjoy the ritual of gathering up the fallen twigs and branches. I used to put them in the garbage can to be hauled to the dump, but then last summer I started to save them to use for kindling in our chiminea. I like the idea of repurposing them.

John knows my love of Tasha Tudor, the children’s book illustrator and writer who I learned about in 2008 just as my first children’s book was published. Though that was the year she passed at the age of 92, I’d become enthralled with her as a woman with a gypsy-like spirit and her love of home and animals.

When I latch onto something as I did with Tasha, I have to learn all I can and it will be something I will talk about pretty much non-stop for quite some time. And John has endured.  🙂 

This led to John catching me in moments such as gathering twigs and branches, or weeding or walking about in my garden, etc. that he’d say, “You are Tudor-ing.” And it’s always said with such affection that it warms me all the way to my toes.

It has often made me think of how the author, Jon Katz often calls his artist wife, Maria Wulf (someone else I greatly admire as a free spirit) his Willa Cather girl. Willa Cather, a woman much like Tasha and a pioneer spirit, plus a writer, and a woman who walked to the beat of her own free spirit.

It’s this connecting to what feels like such a simple life as Tasha and Willa lived that gathering the fallen twigs as I was today that makes me feel grounded and grateful for this precious life.

I couldn’t help but see the image float across my mind of one of Tasha where she is gathering up twigs on the property she lived on in Vermont, that I have framed and is in my writing cottage. I have that image, plus two others in my house that are reminders to me that this is the life I love, and to not get influenced by the outside world that can be persuasive of making me think I need ‘more.’

So as I walked up the steps onto the deck I was grinning thinking of that image of Tasha. I could feel her spirit alive and well in me and just had to get a photo of my ‘inner Tasha’ that was now evident with my arms full of twigs….just like she was so many years ago.

xo,

Barbara

 

 

Owl Asks Us Who We Wish to Be

Posted by Barbara Techel

As the world shakes and rumbles with its deep state of pain and fear being unleased all around us, Owl beckons us to remember to come back to what is our truth – tapping into that wise inner self when things around us feel out of control is what we can take control of as a way of enacting peace.

An owl can turn its head 270 degrees. I like that as a reminder for us that we too must see and look all around us and while we may not agree or understand the different views or what is transpiring, we can work to accept that it is all playing out as a way for each of us to come back home to ourselves and what really matters. The more each of us can do this, the more we can tilt this planet back to a place of peace.

Looking at the Owl card, part of the background design caught my eye – no pun intended – as I saw what looks to me as many eyes closed. I heard in my mind, sit as still as you can among the chaos and uncertainty of the outside world and be assured that true and lasting peace only, and always, comes from within.

What a different world it would be if we hadn’t lost our way so many thousands of years ago when we knew then that the only true and real answers come from trusting in our intuition. It’s the tool of navigation I believe owl is trying to help us get back to and we can begin right here and now.

Owl is also reminding us we can each play our part in practicing being in the darkness by closing our eyes, feeling what we need to feel within our own space of self – instead of projecting it – and to trust that in time this will greatly contribute to humanity making a positive shift.

Who are you going to be? Observing the world around us, we see, we experience, we feel, and we acknowledge the darkness that is here. We then close our eyes and for a moment it is dark within us too as we acknowledge how at times we can feel so helpless. This is our cue to tap into those times in our own lives when this has personally played out – it’s our opportunity to feel those times of pain fully so we can release and heal them. This is what will allow the light to enter within even with our eyes still closed.

There was a time when I would have looked away at something happening in the external world that I simply could not handle because it was too horrific. But I realize the more I am able to look, take it fully into my being, allow it to move through me even though at times it feels excruciatingly painful. But to really feel and acknowledge that this darkness exists, I’ve come to experience that this is the way of actually expanding my heart to feel all that it needs to feel. When I don’t allow all those myriad of feelings I’m experiencing to flow through me it actually stunts the growth of my soul.

We are each so wise beyond what we give ourselves credit for – Owl wants for us to take it all in – eyes closed and accepting the darkness – and eyes wide open to let in the light.

Turning to the guidebook the last paragraph really jumped out at me:

“The solitary owl invites us to deepen our spiritual practices, turn inward for answers, and to develop a trusting relationship with our own intuition. They show us that a stealthy, still, and quiet spiritual practice can be more beneficial than those who take a more ‘loud and proud’ approach.”

Owl asks of us to ponder, who is it we wish to be and become?

xo,

Barbara

Shadow on the Wall Contemplation

Posted by Barbara Techel
Donkey artwork by Kellie Montana

This image with the quote, the donkey painting, and the shadow from the afternoon sun shining through my west window and reflecting onto the east wall of my kitchen really spoke to me.

Donkeys are at the top of my list as one of my favorite animals. It’s their sweetness and their need for love and affection that draws me to them, but it’s also their determination in taking a stand when they don’t wish to do something that I appreciate too.

There is also something so grounding about watching them take the same path they’ve worn down in a field to get to where they need to go. I always enjoy when Maria Wulf of Bedlam Farm shares videos of the farm and the animals and it’s especially the donkeys that I find myself mesmerized by when they walk from one section of the farm to another, along the same worn path.

I guess for me it’s about routine and familiarity that feels stable and calming when I observe the donkeys do this – and it’s rather like a meditation to just sit and observe this.

The “Let’s Stay Home” quote is one I saw in a magazine last year and then asked my sister to make me this sign. For me, staying home more during the pandemic wasn’t that big of a deal as I’m home a lot, to begin with. Though I did have my moments and sometimes still do as we continue to adapt and adjust. But being home and making our space a cozy nest has always been a high value of mine.

But I know this wasn’t the case for some and that’s when the shadow on this image came into play that had me contemplating how this all came together. For some, the shelter in place was a real challenge and it may have meant having to confront some shadow aspects that no doubt felt uncomfortable.

But I see the image of the shadow on the wall speaking to the fact that adjusting to something new or different takes time – see the reflection from the window on the wall and how it is sectioned off? I see this as adapting and adjusting is about just doing what we can, as we can, moment by moment and day by day (taking it one section at a time). And the shadow images of what sits on my window ledge are like new highlights that pop up along the way of things we discover about ourselves that bring a spark of joy or insight we’d not considered before as we move through this new way of being.

So as much as I love my home and being home often, I too have had to take certain aspects of all that has unfolded during this pandemic that has felt uncomfortable and process them as best as I can – one section at a time – one moment at a time. And there have been certain places within myself that I’ve felt a new shift, an accepting, a deeper calming, and expanded gratitude for the simple things. Now that’s a path I wish to walk until it’s well worn – just like the donkeys walk their path.

xo,

Barbara