Heart Somersaults.

Posted by Barbara Techel

g enjoying the sun eI took this photo this past weekend. As I planted annuals and perennials, my garden fairy, a.k.a Gidget, was always close by.

Yesterday on my blog, I asked the question if pets grieve the loss of another pet. Many responded they felt that they do. I shared the post on Facebook also, where many chimed in. Thank you to everyone who shared stories and their thoughts on a topic that is clearly of interest.

I’m still pondering the question, to which there will likely never be a definitive answer — though I find myself leaning toward feeling that they don’t grieve as we do — not that they don’t feel or notice something has changed — but that they just go through it differently than we do, and perhaps some not at all. I would be curious an animal communicator view of this, and perhaps it can be something I discuss with my animal communicator friend at some point.

But this also got me to thinking about my own grief. It’s been six months since I adopted Gidget. Nine months since I said goodbye to Joie and almost two years since Frankie has been gone.

Grief which can be very personal and so deeply intense for we beings called human, but when joy finds you once again in the form of the love of another dog, I find myself in awe of how we always seem to make the transition.

I also know that some don’t or won’t. The loss too great to consider what it could mean for their heart to open up again and let in the love of another dog.

But this weekend, as Gidget spent much time with me outdoors, I felt my heart doing somersaults over and over again each time I glanced her way. You know, those feelings that all of a sudden come over you that are so magical and joyful that you feel as if you might squeal out loud?

I found myself once again grateful to have found the courage to open my heart again to the love of another dog. Each one, in their own unique and special way has taught me things I don’t think I would have otherwise learned. Each one with a special mission to be a part of my life. To bring me a new joy. To become a part of who I am.

Do Pets Grieve the Passing of Another Pet?

Posted by Barbara Techel

g outsideDo pets grieve the passing of another pet? My honest answer to that is that I truly don’t know. I’ve personally not experienced this with any of my dogs, but I’ve read where others truly believe their pet is grieving.

I’ve gotten emails now and then asking me how Kylie has dealt with the passing of Frankie and then Joie. If she was missing them, I didn’t witness it. I recalled after Frankie passed away, and then Joie ten months later, that when I posted a photo of Kylie shortly afterwards, some people said she looked sad – that she must be grieving. But honestly, Kylie just has that kind of face. Ever since she was a pup, people have said she looks sad. But from what I could tell and see, she didn’t seem to be at a loss with Frankie and Joie gone.

K emailed me today asking this question again wondering about Kylie and how she did after Frankie and Joie died. She shared with me that two months ago she lost her beagle mix due to complications of liver cancer. She was 14.5 years old. Her other dog, Pixie, a golden retriever who is 11 years old she said has been having a hard time without the beagle mix. She stated that Pixie has always been a momma’s girl and a “velcro pup” and that she relied on KC for her confidence. She said it now seems that Pixie is sad.

K has a two hour commute to work daily and getting another dog as others have suggested, does not feel right to her being that she is gone so much for her job. She felt that me being home more with Kylie is what helped Kylie with any difficulties when Frankie and Joie passed away. Again, I personally didn’t witness any difficulties for Kylie.

So while I don’t have a definitive answer to this and how to best help, I’ve come to see and understand something about animals I didn’t always see. I believe that our pets are often times a reflection of what is going on inside of us. If we are sad, they will pick up on that. If we are anxious, nervous, or concerned, they will pick up on that, too. Is this always the case? No, I don’t believe so. But I do think it is in more cases, than not. In Kylie’s case, I grieved deeply the loss of Frankie and Joie, but she seemed to be fine. Maybe another dog wouldn’t have been. I don’t know.

I don’t know that they grieve like humans do, but I do believe they feel things. They may miss the presence of a pet that was their companion. I also believe that animals aren’t afraid to die.

In regards to Kylie, I actually think she enjoyed the one on one time with me in-between the loss of Frankie and then Joie, before I adopted Gidget. But she has also been great in adapting each time I brought a new pup into the household.

So I know I’m not really answering the question directly, as I do believe we each know our pets best. If you feel they are sad, perhaps taking them for an extra walk or playing with them more often than usual will help them as they adjust. I also read an article where it said to keep their schedule to as normal as possible. This makes sense to me.

While K said to me she couldn’t afford to talk with an animal communicator right now, which is a suggestion of mine, I do strongly believe it can hold valuable insight not only for your pet, but for the pet owner, too. I’ve personally experienced animal communication in powerful ways that healed me in ways I never expected. I also believe that has helped me be a better person for my dogs.

You can certainly take to the Internet and ask this question via Google and get a wide variety of answers. But I come back to what I believe about pets and that they are here to help us be better people. This means being open to looking inside ourselves and what we may be reflecting out into the world that we may not even be aware of.

My other suggestion is to seek out a pet loss support group (check with your vet’s office). For years I was a volunteer for a local group in my area. While they are usually there to support humans through the grieving process, they may be able to offer resources or suggestions in regards to pets grieving the loss of another pet.

Lastly, I know there will be a huge differing of opinions to this question. But I also think it is a great time to be with the question and really look at it within your own life and what you can learn from it.

Kylie Working her Therapy Dog Magic on Her Special Friend

Posted by Barbara Techel

IMG_0237As I’ve said in the past, as well as write about in my book, “Through Frankie’s Eyes,” I had high hopes that Kylie would have been my therapy dog 8 1/2 years ago when I brought her home as a pup. Instead, Frankie filled that role. And as it turned out, Kylie is a homebody, and venturing out into the world is not her thing.

But she loves and adores our friend, Cassy. In fact, besides me and John, Kylie has never let anyone lay on her like a pillow as she does with Cassy.

These two were meant to come together in the special way that they have. To fill a beautiful role in each others lives. It always warms my heart when I see these two bonding together. I love them both so much.

Last night we grilled out, played ladder golf, and had beautiful conversation with Cassy. We reminisced about how the fact this weekend one year ago she came to live with us as she transitioned through a divorce. Last summer seems now like it is so surreal. But in that time we all formed a bond  that feels like our own special definition of family.

We all have learned so much in the past year – some times trying and hard – but the rewards of being there for Cassy have been some of the greatest blessings for John and I. We often call her our “little bird.” To see her flying out into the world on her own now (she moved out last September) comes with so many emotions I never thought I’d experience and I’m grateful for all of them.

And it turns out after all that Kylie is her own unique therapy dog in that she will always give Cassy a soft place to lay her head when she needs it, as we will always welcome Cassy to her “home away from home” when she needs it, too.