Frankie snuggled in as I read last night
Though I’m not satisfied with the last chapter I wrote, I also know ending a book, or article for that matter, is usually a challenge for me. So letting it rest, I know in time, the end will work out perfectly. But I’m taking great joy in knowing the first draft of my book is complete– now the real work begins.
I welcome the “real work.” I can now plunge back in and concentrate on each chapter, word by word, thought by thought. Getting it all out onto the pages was the first step and that is complete. I struggled greatly with writing the last chapter. In part because I talk about my thoughts on Frankie dying one day- which was prompted this summer by it seeming like so many people asking me what I will do when Frankie is gone. She turned 12 in August, so I suspect people worry the end is nearer than further away. I suppose they have a point. But none of knows when we are going to die.
The other part I struggled with, not only with the last chapter, but in my writing of late is because of some things that have been bothering me. While I don’t want to go into the particulars, I was very aware of how when my mind is full of other worries, I find it hard to come to my writing. This in turn upsets me and I have a little war that goes on inside my head. Today I had enough with the million thoughts in my head and sat down to write. I’m so glad I did. It felt so good.
My writing brought me back to what has meaning to me– what makes me happy– what brings me joy. Though yes, I was writing about grief, I’ve learned so much in the past two years about myself and new possibilities when Frankie does pass on.
I’m still not quite sure of the title, Through Frankie’s Eyes, Lessons Learned from a Dachshund on Wheels but I try not to put too much thought into that for now. I’m better now at being open and knowing all things have their time and place. It will all come together. Trust the process, I remind myself.
So today I celebrate that I wrote my first draft of my very first nonfiction book! Woo hoo! Next I will print out the pages and begin dissecting each page of each chapter. Once that is complete I will have my 2nd draft which will then go to my editor. Life is good.
PS: My reward is that I will put up my Christmas decorations in my studio now. Oh, what joy!