The view out my life uncommon writing cottage windows this morning.
Many writers, artists and creatives seem to live a life uncommon. I got to thinking about this over the weekend after reading a blog post called “Committing to Your Life” by author Jon Katz.
It’s interesting because I never really put myself in this category. Maybe subconsciously I did. But I realize in many ways that John and I are leading a life uncommon. Uncommon because we really try to live by our own definition of what matters and sometimes going against what society has ingrained in us is the “right” way to live.
When the stock market and the economy took a major nose dive in 2008, John and I were both scared we would lose his business and possibly our home. But more than that, we were scared we would lose what we both love to do. John being a small business owner of his remodeling company, and me wanting to write, share a positive message about special needs dogs, and volunteer. I also love to be home. It took me years to be okay with this and not worry about what others may think about it.
We took a big risk and cashed in our retirement money and paid off our home, as well as, a few small business loans. Our financial adviser tried to talk us out of it. This may seem like a huge risk to many, and sometimes, yes, it still scares me about the “what if’s.” I actually wrote about this in my book Through Frankie’s Eyes. But when I did, I was still carrying shame around this and wrote between the lines, so to speak, leaving readers to try and guess what I meant.
But I don’t want to hide from this any longer. This is our life. While I’ve said it out loud on other occasions among others I felt safe with, I don’t believe I’ve said this as clear as this on my blog until now.
In thinking about a life uncommon and not having a “nest egg” I also give thought to what if John and I weren’t doing what we both loved? Isn’t that a risk for so much more? I think so. What if we still had that retirement money, but we died before we got to use it? That seems like a bigger risk to us.
While yes, I worry on occasion about the what if’s of life, I also am living a pretty happy life. I love my life. I love each day that I can determine my purpose for the day instead of waiting for that “someday” I may retire after possibly being unhappy in a job I didn’t like.
I don’t know what the future holds, nor does anyone. But I do know that I make a conscious choice to choose being happy in this moment, this day. To not follow my heart is something I can’t do after working so hard to get to this point. This is what is now ingrained in me.
As I write this post, my writing cottage windows are wide open, the sun is streaming in from the east, the birds are chirping, the wind is gently blowing, and Gidget is snoozing next to my writing desk. I have projects I’m excited to work on. I have blog post ideas brewing in my head. I have new adventures ahead in volunteering. This is the life uncommon that I want.