This past Wednesday, the first official day of Spring, I was brought to tears when I pulled the goddess Gaia from the Power Goddess Oracle deck. I couldn’t take my eyes off her. A swirl of emotions spiraled through me.
This card couldn’t have been more perfect. Not only for the changing of the season and one of re-birth but also the self I’ve given birth to over the past year. I saw myself in Gaia and I liked what I saw.
A year ago this time was quite different as I was moving through such an intensely emotional time. As I continue editing my latest book, I’m Fine Just the Way I Am, I’m able to witness through the words I’ve written and of how far I’ve come.
This spring feels and looks quite different to me. The light is absolutely freeing and brilliant. The smells and sounds, from birds singing, to the church bells ringing, and children playing in the park have me feeling enthusiastically alive. And so very grateful that I am.
The second card I pulled Wednesday morning from a deck called Moonology fit beautifully with Gaia. As I saw it as a reflection of when we do the hard work of working through what isn’t always easy, it truly is a re-birth that occurs, as we can’t help but be changed.
And in being honest, I had a brief sad moment, of which I’ve had before, especially the older I get, that I’ll never experience giving birth to a child. But I allow it to surface and acknowledge it. And then I remember all the different ways I have given birth. This was my journey to walk. I have no regrets.
And it’s in the simple pleasures of gathering up the bedding this morning and once through the washing machine to hang it all on the line, I find grounding and a peaceful space within. I never tire of this. It feels like a ritual from long ago and echoes of others who enjoyed this too, though I can’t quite hear, but yet I feel them near.
It also may only be in the mid-40s as I write this to you, but I just couldn’t help but put a pair of flip-flops on. I’m most happy in either boots or flip-flops – nothing in-between. As silly as it may sound, there would have been a day I’d not felt comfortable in sharing a photo of my feet without my toenails painted. It feels so freeing to let go of some of the inhibitions that can make life more complicated than it needs to be.
The sun streams through the bedroom windows at new angles with the changing of the light and the season. And one not to miss out is Miss Gidget. And add to her sweet spot soaking up the sun is burrowing her way into the sheets that lay on the floor before they found their way to the laundry room.
And this…this provided me another simple pleasure that made my heart happy. And as promised in the title of this blog post, I did say there was a dachshund in here somewhere. Anywhere there is sun and blankets or sheets in this case, is the perfect place for a wiener dog to nestle.
Signs of spring abound. And it’s understanding the darkness as a gift that makes the light all the more profound and beautiful.
XO,
Barbara
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