empath relationships

My Rock. Happy Anniversary!

He is my rock. I am his water.

Thirty-six years of learning to embrace the qualities we each have that guide us to ebb and flow as a couple.

My astrological chart is full of water signs. John’s chart is pretty much all earth signs. It really is a perfect balance. Though this wasn’t always easy to understand about each other at the beginning of our relationship.

This week I’ve been reading Dr. Judith Orloff’s book, The Empath’s Survival Guide, Life Strategies for Sensitive People. It was serendipity that led me to the book after the week before when I was experiencing intense emotional pain. I realize now it was a culmination of the last few months and what we’ve been through in 2020 – and well, I finally tipped over the edge.

So much of what I’d held in came bubbling to the surface and over the next few days, I sifted through what it was about and how I needed to move forward. One of the gifts was that I was led to Dr. Orloff’s self-assessment empath test. After going through the twenty questions and having answered yes to seventeen of them, the results showed me as in the category of a full-blown empath.

There was relief in that, though I’ve known I’m an empath, but to the degree of which I wasn’t aware of. I chuckled to myself, but also realized I had some inner work to do. I’m grateful for Dr. Orloff’s book which has brought me much comfort.

So how does this apply to the rock of my life? Well, in short – I chose well. Or perhaps what I really believe to be true is that it was destined to be that John and I would become partners.

I loved this statement in the book: “In a soul mate relationship, both people are dedicated to their own and the other’s growth.” While I didn’t realize this at the beginning of our relationship it became clear to me in my early 40s how blessed I was to have this with John.

Reading further I came to this type of partner and knew this is the one I have in John: “The Rock, or Strong and Silent Type – Consistent, dependable, and stable, this type of partner will always be there to lean on. Empaths can express emotions freely around them. Rocks won’t get alarmed or be critical. They can be counted on, which is reassuring for empaths, who love consistency. But Rocks often have a hard time sharing their own feelings. Their empath mates may keep trying to get them to open up but become frustrated with the slow progress (I can so relate to this! But I will say John is much better now at opening up. 🙂 ).

Empaths and Rocks can make wonderful partners. They balance each other. Rocks can learn from empaths how to express their emotions and passion more clearly, while empaths can learn to be more grounded from Rock (I’ve definitely learned this from John!). It’s not that Rocks don’t have feelings; it’s that they need loving support to bring them out. Their feet are solid on the earth.”

So today on our wedding anniversary I’m feeling especially grateful for my Rock. And I found myself moved to tears when I unexpectedly came across a song this morning that I’d not heard before. No doubt Spirit put this in my path.

John and I are hoping to make it happen that we can go to Blue Ridge, GA for two months this winter. He’s been presented with a wonderful opportunity to do some remodeling work on a beautiful home his sister and husband bought in the mountains.

I’ve been blessed to have seen the Blue Ridge mountains a couple of times already in my life and each time I’ve been in their presence I’m moved to tears. I don’t know why that is, but all I can say is that it feels good to be around them.

With all that has transpired this year, it has sunk in deeper how short this one precious life is that we have. While a part of me can’t imagine being gone two months from my cozy home and my Joyful Pause Cottage where I work, another part of me really wants to make the trip. And at times I picture myself packing my laptop, some books, and art supplies to find inspiration in the mountains.

And this is where the song comes in…and the line that brought tears to my eyes…and must surely be a sign from Spirit…

“and if you take my hand I’ll walk with you to Georgia.”

XO,

Barbara