Every 1st and 3rd Thursday of the month until July 18th I will be sharing my thoughts about turning 50 which I will celebrate on July 18th.  And yes, I said, celebrate!

Today I want to share two things my mother forgot to tell me about aging.  Let’s just begin with saying, turkey and mirrors.  Maybe if you’ve already experienced these dirty little secrets you will know what I am talking about. But for those of you who haven’t, let me explain.

#1 of things my mother forgot to warn me about…

I was in my early forties when I encountered the trick a mirror played on me. I had been moving things around in our bedroom. I had a decorative mirror I took down from the wall and laid it on the bed until I could figure out where I would place it next (I think I heard a gasp and “Oh no! Not the mirror affect!)

Happy as could be, in my element of re-decorating, I was my joyful  little self re-arranging things. It was then time to hang the mirror as I had found a wonderful new spot for it. I bent over the mirror to pick it up, while glancing down. Now this gets rather ugly, so if you are squeamish you might want to stop reading.  But there in the mirror was someone I didn’t recognize!  All the skin that stayed somewhat firm on my face when I stood vertical, was now a saggy, sloppy mess hanging from the bones of my face– or so it appeared to be.  Was this just an illusion?

Illusion or not, it was my first glimpse into skin that was once so taut, was now heading south– and I don’t mean to Florida or a warmer climate. It was heading south without flip flops or a straw hat. It was not going on vacation, but will be around for some time to come. I won’t know how far south it will travel in the next few years as I continue to get older. But if I am lucky, and have my mom’s genes, I’ll be doing pretty good.

#2 of things my mother forgot to warn me about…

I’ve witnessed first hand the turkey affect on many people. Though never did I think it would happen to me. I’ve done my best to stay healthy, eat as well as possible, and stay in shape. But the turkey visited me this past early winter.

It was a blustery day and a turtleneck was in order to keep me warm. I pulled down my favorite black one that always fit snug around my neck.  I pulled it over my head and the coziness enveloped me… that is, until I looked into the mirror. That dang mirror again!  And this time it had a new surprise for me.

As I turned my head to the side I wondered what that was on my neck?  Taking my forefinger and feeling as if this was all a dream, I bravely flicked what seemed to be loose skin hanging under my chin! One flick to the right and it jiggled a bit like jello.  Another flick to the left and again it jiggled. I stretched my neck and stood as tall as I possibly could to see if it would disappear. No such luck– it still jiggled.

What if I held my head real still, I wondered?  Would anyone notice? After much back and forth I ripped off the turtleneck and threw it back on the shelf. I argued in my head I should just throw the darn thing away.  Nah, I thought.  I’m just having a bad neck day. Two days later I tried again. That darn turkey wasn’t leaving, I could tell.  I either had to accept it or live in misery.  I decided to accept fate as it was, though wondering why on earth my mother never warned me about this?

Well let me tell you, she had one darn good chuckle when I shared the news with her. And I laughed too. And we agreed that whoever made mock turtlenecks knew what they were doing. It was time. There was a rainbow of mock necks waiting for me. I stood tall and proud. I could do this.

And so it is. Turkey and mirrors. Though initially hard to face these things, I don’t dwell on them and do try to find some humor in it all.  I’m also reminded of how to truly live life through the eyes of my dogs. Joie in her wheels her little legs wobbly under her.  Kylie who has a large fatty tumor on her belly that sways back and forth when she walks. And now me with my jiggly turkey neck and gravity pulling me closer to the earth. We are the land of the misfits. None of us perfect, but all of us happy and in the moment of each others company.

I can’t control the aging process but I can control my attitude. So I say, Forward March to 50!

”  . . . and if you can’t see anything beautiful about yourself, get a better mirror… ~Shane Koyczan