The adorable Ms. Katy, photographer, Lisa’s 12-year old poodle.  It was pure joy meeting her during my photo shoot today and a welcome bonus.  This photo of Katy was taken by Lisa.

 This morning I made my way to Lehmann Photography Art & Design to have owner and photographer, Lisa take photos of me for new author head shots in anticipation of my new book, Through Frankie’s Eyes.

Being the sentimental gal that I am , I knew this would likely stir feelings of missing Frankie, which it did as I got in the car to head over to Lisa’s studio.  I had originally scheduled the shoot for June 19, but had to cancel when Frankie became so ill.  It was to have been a new shoot of her and me for my book cover, as well as a photo of Frankie for the 2013 local therapy dog calendar, and then some new head shots for me to use.

As we all know, life does not always go as planned.  It took me some time getting over the fact I would now not have a new photo of me and Frankie.  And quite frankly, I loved having my photo taken with Frankie, so to not have that option felt odd.

My eyes misted over with tears thinking about all this as I drove down the highway, but I quickly turned my attention to the fact that this is what is meant to be.  I have to focus on what I’ve all gained from my time with Frankie- rejoice in all the good. I smiled and knew all would be well.  I had a new idea for a book cover shot that I truly thought we would do today… but overnight I awoke at 2:00am and something told me I shouldn’t do it.  Then this morning driving to the studio it continued to nag at me.

In my mind I said, “Okay, Barb, what is your heart and gut telling you?  Follow that.  It’s right.”  When I arrived at Lisa’s studio and discussed my concern she said the same thing, “What is your gut telling you?”

“Not to do it, “I said.

So we decided to do the head shots first and if I changed my mind she would do the other idea I had in mind.  But I never did change my mind.  I’m glad I didn’t.  I think I’m on the right path with a new idea for the book cover, which friend and marketing consultant, Mary came up with for me.  But guess what?  I can’t tell you what it is yet!  But I think you’ll be happily surprised when I finally do reveal the cover… so stay tuned!!

But here’s the bottom line.  We can get so caught up in what is the absolute “right thing” to do that all the experts will tell you… and they will all have one opinion or another.  But when it comes down to it, this book is my blood, sweat and tears and the idea Mary came up with for the book cover feels right to me.  I also think my readers of this blog and those that have followed me on my journey will also be happy with it, too.  Maybe it won’t be what an “expert” would say is the right thing to do… but I can tell you this… it is my heart.  I can also tell you that on the deepest level of my whole thought process for it feels good… and I want to follow that.  And I can’t wait to share the cover and the whole thought process with you in the future.

As all of this went through my mind today, I found myself smiling once again at all that Frankie gave me while she was here for such a short time.  Though she couldn’t talk, I could hear her cheering me on saying, “Mama, you can do it.  You are doing it!  You are standing on your own.” And so I am.