self reflection

An Opened Heart Finds Peace and a Special Offering: A Love Letter to the Part of You in Pain

Posted by Barbara Techel

An Opened Heart Finds Peace and a Special Offering: A Love Letter to the Part of You in Pain

I’ve been reflecting on 2018 as this year begins to come to a close in less than two months.

While personally I started out the year going through intense emotional pain, and my coping skills that almost became nil, I’m happy to say I’m now in a space of deep gratitude for what I learned, and how far I’ve come.

Walking through this dark period, there were times I honestly wanted to run the other way. At my rock bottom point, the thought crossed my mind that I’d rather die than deal with the pain I was going through.

That startled me! But the blessing is that it was a wake-up call.

Step-by-step with support from many, I moved through this difficult time, and eventually came to experience an opening of my heart unlike anything I’ve felt before.

From this journey, I’ve created a special offering for others who are going through an emotionally challenging time also. It’s something I sat in many hours of contemplation and with careful thought I wrote:

A Love Letter to the Part of You in Pain. (if this resonates, you will find a link below to download a copy)

It’s my hope it will give others just that, hope. And to trust that there is freedom and peace to be had on the other side of emotional pain.

Recently I heard what is described as the “Sacred Wound,”coined by Jean Houston, Ph.D., author, scholar, philosopher and researcher in Human Capacities, and who began the human potential movement.

The idea of the Sacred Wound as Jean writes is, “Looking back on your own betrayals, you may notice how they’ve given you the necessary shove, the unwelcome but needed kick in the pants to invite you to get on with it, to release patterns and attachments that need to die. The key to redeeming our betrayals is forgiveness.”  

This is exactly what I faced earlier this year – forgiving where I felt betrayed in my past – and most challenging of all, was forgiving myself when I experienced unfamiliar and very uncomfortable feelings of resentment and anger toward my sweet and loving dog, Gidget. She was my reflection to finally see the part of me that was broken and was desperately calling to be healed.

This is something that has taken me years to understand because I often thought if I just read this or that book, or took this or that class, I’d be okay.

But it was dedicating myself to digging into my inner world and really looking at my own story, that I was able to see how that affected my insecurities and struggles. Being a gentle witness to this helped me to make a welcome shift. 

I’ll be sharing more about this journey in my new book I continue to work on, I’m Fine Just the Way I Am —and how Gidget lovingly and unconditionally walked beside me as my soulful guide.

Not only did I move through a metamorphosis, but I’ve been witness to the gift of a beautiful change and a new sense of peace within Gidget, too.

I’ve come to understand that my sacred wound was a spiritual lesson I needed to go through in order to embrace on an even deeper level not only empathy, compassion and love, but that I was never alone (even though I often felt that way).

For the first time in my 55-years on this planet, I felt the undeniable love of Spirit embrace me as I took the necessary steps forward in healing.

It was by reaching out for help from animal communicator Dawn Brunke, pet counselor and coach, Joe Dwyer, Depth Psychologist and Dream Analyst, Tayria Ward, Transformational Breathwork® practioner, Parnee Frederick, a session of Emotional Freedom Technique with a therapist, my monthly Women’s Mastermind Circle, and last but not least, my dear mom and husband, that I found the courage to do the inner work I needed to do.

Also the fact I was enrolled in Oracle School during this time, working with oracle cards as a tool for self-reflection I was able to gain perspectives about myself I’d not have considered.

It enabled me to see what I could change, while being compassionate with myself, which helped me move forward with more confidence. 

I continue to be committed to my personal growth so that I can move through my little corner of the world from a place of love and peace and be of service to others who also seek more inner peace through my oracle guidance sessions.

And so it is I present this offering, A Love Letter to the Part of You in Pain….because you matter and you are worthy just as you are.

Just click on graphic to be taken to link to sign up to receive a copy:

Please note the link to the love letter includes receiving my newsletter.

XO,

Barb

 

The “Digger” that Reminded Me the Importance of Slowing Down

Posted by Barbara Techel

The “Digger” that Reminded Me the Importance of Slowing Down

We had about six inches of snow yesterday. With not a cloud in the sky and the sun shining so brilliantly this morning, I felt the call to saunter in the woods.

After doing a reading for a client, I scampered into the house, and layered on all my winter gear. I was excited to meet up with Mr. Walking Stick once again.

As I approached the pine tree on the right at the end of the first leg of the path, I could see my faithful walking stick friend nestled in the branches where I carefully place him after each of my walks.

As I reached out and grabbed him, I silently I said, “Hello, Mr. Walking Stick. Are you ready to go?”

Thinking about the client I had just met with, I was holding her in my heart that she find a sense of direction she is in search of, and the cards revealing that taking time to pause and go inward was being called for.

The gift of pausing has been on my mind much lately too.

My feet happy to be the first ones making tracks in the new fallen snow, but my mind still in a thousand other places, and before I knew it, out went my feet from under me, and I found myself on my back, staring up at the blue sky.

There was ice under the snow and down I went with my head being the last to hit the ground. Luckily, with all my padding of clothing and enough snow, I didn’t really feel hurt anywhere, but was just stunned for a moment.

And it was a reminder for me as I brushed myself off and continued my walk.

Walking in winter is so much different and my favorite quote from author and illustrator, Tasha Tudor echoed in my mind, “I don’t believe in hurry.”

It’s no wonder I love that quote as it is something I continually work on practicing and integrating into my life. Taking that fall was another reminder. There was no need to be in a hurry to get to the woods – they weren’t  going anywhere, after all. But I did have on my mind what was “next” on my schedule when I returned to my writing cottage.

Also, having a passion for much in life, and wanting to experience as much as I can, I can sometimes forget and hurry, instead of just being in the moment of what is. Though I must say I’m much, much better than years ago, and I’m grateful for how far I’ve come.

But as I continued my walk through the woods, I made sure to consciously connect with each step. As I did, I also took time to stop every few feet and look around. With so much gear on, my face mostly covered by my large furry hood, it requires making an effort to look left, right, up and behind.

It was such a perfect metaphor for life, I thought, being in conscious mind, making sure I carefully watched each step I took in the snow, as I wound my way down and up and over the snow covered paths, but also pausing now and then to take in all the beauty around me.

So I’m grateful for the “digger” and even more so, that I didn’t break anything! But even more than that, I am grateful for the reminder of how much beauty there is when we live more in the moment, and not what just was, or what will be.

Last by not least, I recalled this drawing my Facebook friend and artist, Abrah Griggs, recently shared. She’s an amazing artist by the way, and I invite you to check out her fun art that often has birds and spiders wearing galoshes! At any rate, I’m not sure her meaning behind this drawing, but for me it means that whether or not I’d have cleats on, if I’m not in the moment and paying attention…. well, I’m still likely going to fall on my ARS!

P.S. Don’t worry mom, I’m okay. Even at 54 1/2 years old, I know my mama still worries about me, so just need to reassure her I am fine. XOImage may contain: drawing

Reflection: I Kid You Not. This Really Happened.

Posted by Barbara Techel

IMG_1992 eI am on day ten of the ecourse, “The Sacred Alone” facilitated by Susannah Conway.  Every morning I’ve read the essay, done the 5-minute meditation, and wrote in my journal for at least 10 minutes. Except for Sunday, when I did The Sacred Alone in the afternoon, which was a lovely change of pace for that day.

Yesterday we worked with holding beads in our hands during the meditation, so I added the beads to this small altar that has now become an unplanned altar of sorts, dedicated to the sacred alone time I’m doing.

Today’s meditation is what Susannah called, “Mirror Meditation.” I am familiar with mirror work having been introduced to it through my life coach many years ago.

But using it within a meditation was intriguing… as well as, challenging. We were encouraged to look into a mirror. I chose the one I had nearby which is a small round one as you see in the photo.

We were told to just look without making any judgment. So looking in a mirror pretty much first thing in the morning isn’t what most women would say is their favorite thing to do. But being dedicated to this ritual, I didn’t want to back down even though it felt uncomfortable at first.

Right away, forgetting what Susannah just said, I noticed my flaws, or what I really should say as “perceived” flaws. The blemish on my nose, the age spots, the dark in the corner of my eyes, my neck which wrinkles that seem to wrinkle a little more each day. While looking at my neck, in my head I heard myself say, “What is that anyways?”

Susannah guided us in the short meditation challenging ourselves to really look at ourselves kindly and with compassion. To think of someone we love and cherish as if you were looking at them, but to apply that to our own reflection. To look into our own eyes and like what we see. To say to ourselves out loud, I see you, I honor you,  I love you. It felt odd, but Susannah assured us that was okay.

After the meditation, one of our prompts for journaling was to write what came up for us when we looked in the mirror. Thinking of my friend who I adore, who I had thought of when I was looking in the mirror, I realized something.

It’s something I continue to work on within myself— to be a reflection and an example to other women to like who they are. I’m not always perfect, and am a work in progress. But this friend came into my mind and I knew it was a reminder to me to be that example not only for her, but for other women too. To like what I see. To honor myself so they too can honor themselves.

As I wrote those words, I was moved to tears. After I was done writing in my journal, as I’ve done since starting this ecourse, (though it is not actually part of the 20-minute ritual), I picked a Grace card. I pick one at random or follow my intuition. The word reflection popped in my head as I picked up the deck of cards. So I counted how many letters are in reflection and counted to card 10.

I kid you not… this is the card that came up — SELF: Go within. When we invest more energy in developing our spiritual lives, the outer world begins to take care of itself.

Goosebumps ran up and down my arms. Wow, I thought, this is amazing. I sat in awe for quite a few moments and couldn’t believe what just happened.

Then later this morning I received a text from the very same friend who I thought about while I did my mirror meditation. She sent me a photo she took of herself with her phone, looking into her mirror. It looks like her, but yet, it does not. It was so very beautiful. I wanted to cry from the shear beauty of it, but also from how connected I felt in that moment with her– as if we were seeing each others soul’s, both having done mirror work in our own way without realizing the other was doing it.  By the way, she is not taking this ecourse, so she wouldn’t have known I had just done this same thing this morning.

It was just the photo of her and no text. In some ways, I felt like I was looking at my younger self after having just done the mirror work. It felt so surreal.

I then checked my email. I subscribe to Daily Joyride, so each day I get a different quote.  This is the quote that was in my inbox:

“Tear off the mask. Your face is beautiful.” -Rumi

No denying there was absolute synchronicity going on here today. I’m still marveling in it and will likely for quite some time to come.