a place of one’s own

From the Inside Out: Views from Joyful Pause Cottage and Reflecting on Twelve Years.

This year marks twelve years since my husband, John, built me my special little sanctuary. A 10 x 12 space that sits off the southwest corner of our deck. Twelve steps from our bedroom patio door.

As I reflect on how this space came to be and what it means to me I will share a few photos of views looking out the different windows. This time of year is especially abundant and had me feeling so much joy that I wanted to share.

I started out calling it my writing cottage because this is where I began my writing endeavors. Twenty-four newspaper columns, two children’s books, three memoirs, and 2,701 (plus one including this one!) blog posts later it has morphed into so much more now. I guess you could say so have I.

Because I’ve evolved over the years and this space has welcomed me every day as I walked through the Victorian screen door and it’s supported me each step of the way, I now call it Joyful Pause Cottage. 

The word pause is a play on words with how my writing endeavors began and my love of animals and naming my website Joyful Paws. The dogs I’ve shared my life with were the inspiration behind my beginning to write about them which morphed into sharing a love of all animals. Then seeing animals as oracles – mentors/teachers – just like nature also is. Always reflecting for us some aspect that provides teachings that guide us on our earthly journey. Animals and nature have taught me that pausing often and reflecting on what really matters is what continues to bring me peace.

It was important for me, though I didn’t realize the full scope of it at the time, that I have many windows with natural light for my cottage. I wanted to feel like I was outside even though I’d be indoors. I wanted to feel connected even though I was also yearning for more solitary time.

Little did I know a trend would occur a few years later with what was dubbed “She Sheds” — more women seeking a space of their own to retreat to, to create, and/or to just be. My little corner of the world seemed to have led the way and made it onto the websites of some of the national news outlets. I’d also be invited to do an interview via satellite with a morning show out of Australia and I was interviewed by a local news station. 

Some thought it selfish that women would want a space of their own. “What’s a house for?” one person wrote and comments even more snarky than that. Though there were many positive comments, too. But I think back then how I’d be offended by the negative statements, but now, pfff, I don’t care. I know what having this space has done for me, and quite honestly, it has enriched my relationship with my animal friends, my husband, and most importantly myself. You see, we have to bust out of that conditioned pattern of thinking we don’t ‘deserve’ what our hearts yearn for.

All the attention has faded now, which is perfectly fine with me. This quiet corner of my world is what makes me thrive. Makes me happy to get up in the morning. What sometimes brings me to tears for how grateful I feel. Tears I have also shed and how Joyful Pause Cottage has held me when I mourned the loss of many dogs and a few friends. The joy I’ve experienced in this space also for how far I’ve come in so many ways.

This is also the space I’ve welcomed in via zoom interviews about my books and what animals have taught me, but it’s also where I do oracle card readings for others seeking guidance and for those struggling with challenges with their animal friends. I like to think of this space as a little respite and sort of like a safe cocoon for others who seek me out for some mentoring and support — even though most are done virtually I hope others can feel the love and empathy that not only comes from me but from this space that supports me in continuing my mission to be of service. 

It’s also morphed into a space that encourages me to explore a different creative medium of mixed media. Eventually, I’ll share more of what this is all about and what I’ve been working on. I hope you’ll stay tuned.

Lastly, I leave you with a final view, though this isn’t from the inside out. I rarely take a photo of what I guess would be considered the front of my cottage. But it’s a reminder that sometimes we have to take the time to look at life from a different perspective. I just love how I caught the sun dancing on it this morning. I felt like a fairy standing along the grown-in gulley which was behind me as I snapped this picture. Sometimes life is just so dang magical I feel like I could fly!

Wishing you each a magical week!

XO

Barb

                  

A Fresh New Start in My Writing Cottage

I woke up Sunday morning with the niggle to clean up my writing cottage. So I spent the day decluttering, dusting, re-arranging, discarding and sweeping. I could hardly wait to come out to my writing cottage Monday morning as the new, refreshing energy was calling to me.

Walking through the door I was giddy with the light and airy feeling that embraced me. I just sat in my chair and took a moment to slowly look all around the room. It felt like I was floating on a feather that was ever so gently drifting in the wind.

I thought about how my latest book is complete. I have a clean slate and another opportunity at a fresh new start.

Looking at my altar(the photo above) which takes on different objects throughout the seasons, I thought about Gidget. In May it will be one year since she moved on. Her photo had been on my altar since then. I can’t tell you how often I looked at it, talked to her, and stroked the body and ears of the photo.

I also knew yesterday as I cleaned and re-arranged that it was time to move her from the altar. My altar—a space where I go for my inward work— pulling oracle cards, journaling my thoughts, connecting with my heart, and one that supports my continued healing journey.

While there are times I still miss her physical presence these last nine months have also been filled with what I find so difficult to put into words— it’s been a time of what I can only describe as a deepening of my love and gratitude for her and how she walked so very lovingly beside me as I went through a very dark time.

I’ve often said, and will continue to say because it’s what I believe, is that we are all a work in progress and we are always in some phase of healing. Gidget’s teaching continues to be such a blessing and I’ve found myself expanding on it even though she is gone. I welcome being in this new space of relationship with her. I feel also like I’ve moved into a new space of healing and why I felt called to move her photo from the altar. 

I placed the photo on my writing desk and to the right of my computer. This feels symbolic to me. She was the one that patiently and with such devotion stood by me through it all – knowing and believing I could find my way out of the darkness. She is the one that helped me finally accept that I am worthy – just as I am. I know and feel this now.

Having her photo on my desk where I can see her and she is looking back at me is a nod to her wise, healer self, and her beautiful teaching to me that I’ve learned to embody that says, this is me and I’m Fine Just the Way I Am.

My writing cottage has a fresh new start, my heart one too, and my relationship with Gidget that continues to evolve and is my beacon of guiding light I feel so remarkably blessed to have.

xo,

Barbara