creativity

My Perfectionist Kept Me Awake Last Night

My Perfectionist Kept Me Awake Last Night
My Inner Critic SoulCollage® Card

It was midnight when I found myself wide awake. Around and around and around in my mind went thoughts and worries about the workshop I’ll be facilitating tonight. Third in a series of five and tonight we will explore and create SoulCollage® cards for one or all of the following — Maiden, Mother and Crone.

I tossed and turned trying everything to talk myself out of my concerns.

As 2016 came to an end I knew in my heart I was being strongly called to facilitate many more workshops in 2017 and bring women together in circle to gently guide them to creatively tap into their intuition to connect with their True Self and live a more meaningful life.

In many ways this is new territory for me. Along with lots of researching and learning as I go it’s a new energy I’m working with that I’ve not before.

Most recently I was introduced to The Circle Way as a structure to help create a safe container for women to tune into their intuition, create and share their stories.

While I’m grateful to now know about The Circle Way and which I’m integrating in my workshops, it’s still new to me. I worry that I won’t do it “right.” And I’m realizing this is my Inner Critic, which is also disguised as my perfectionist, who is showing herself more often.

Even though I’ve done much inner work on myself, the thing is it is never “one and we are done” but that we will now and then be challenged. This is what comes with growing and evolving.

The good news is that I can now more easily recognize what is going on. So this morning I pulled the card I made to represent my Inner Critic.  Here she is in purple worried that others will talk behind her back saying she isn’t any good at this facilitating role.

And seeing in the background the Egyptian woman with her hands raised I heard her say, “Stop all the madness!”

It brought me back to my senses and understanding that my Inner Critic has my best interest in mind. My Inner Critic wants to keep me safe and protect me. She really means no harm. She just needed to be acknowledged for her important role in my life.

So I silently talked to her and said, “Thank you for your concern. I got this. You can now rest for awhile.”

It’s going to be a great night with my Women’s Circle!

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SoulCollage® cards are not sold, traded, or bartered to respect the artists whose images are collaged in the cards.

What Wolf Taught Me About Passion

My Wolf SoulCollage(r) card

No passion is too small. This is what I heard from one of the speakers during a women’s gathering webinar I recently listened to.

She went on to say that if your passion is making cookies, then make cookies with everything you’ve got.

I resonated with the speaker talking about how we think our passion has to be some grand thing, when in fact, it does not.

No wonder failure is something we carry around with us like a heavy load of bricks — especially women, who in my experience, seem to find fault in ourselves when something does not work out.

I believe we’ve also tied passion to earning money. I know I have. So when my expectations weren’t met in terms of financial gain, I’d tend to feel like I wasn’t good enough.

While at times it can still be a challenge for me, I’ve come a long way in realizing passion is so much more. It’s that feeling in my heart, when I’m in the bliss of what I love to do, that no amount of money could ever fulfill.

And that is what we need to be doing more of. That passion that lights us up…no matter what it is. That speaks to the depth of our soul. That makes time feel like an illusion, because when we are living more from that passionate place within, our whole being is alive.

During a guided visualization with a life coach a few years ago, struggling with where I was meant to go next on my life’s path and questioning my passion, it was when I saw a white wolf on my path.

I was sitting at the base of a mountain and a white wolf slowly walked toward me. When she sat at my feet my heart exploded into a knowing and I heard her tell me to never let that fire in my heart dim. She encouraged me to keep being who I am and let my heart lead the way.

I still remember to this day, driving home down the country roads after my coaching session knowing I had to capture that visualization in a tangible way. It was a month before I was scheduled to take the training to become a SoulCollage facilitator that I made my first SoulCollage card.

In doing so, I experienced the profound affect it had in helping me bring what was in my subconscious to live more fully into my consciousness by having this card of collaged images as a reminder – a reminder to always seek first what my heart knows best for my life.

And now, after listening to that lovely speaker, I’m reminded how passion can be anything we want it to be. And in my opinion, it can be more than one thing – just anything that lights that spark within – follow that. Follow it often. And find a way to capture it in words, images, or a creative way as a tangible reminder of what matters most to you.

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Be the Light and Come Fly with Me

Be the Light and Come Fly with Me
Butterfly “In The Moment” Energy Painting by Julia Watkins

“You are in transformation. It’s a beautiful place to be.” These are the words I heard from a dear woman who is part of a women’s mastermind circle I’m part of that just began in January of this year.

We meet once a month to support each other in our celebrations, guide us in our challenges, and speak our truth in order to not only move forward in our own individual lives, but to hopefully be the example that shining our light can positively affect those around us.

On this, International Women’s Day, I’m riding on a cloud of gratitude to have been with these five amazing women today and in this time of great change.

For three years I was in transition, which I’d ultimately come to realize was a gift and I write about in my latest book, Wisdom Found in the Pause – Joie’s Gift.

From that transition I realized I was being called to offer creative workshops for women to guide them through their own transitions and transformations, and help them step more fully into their being. It is something I’ve become very passionate about.

But the road hasn’t always been easy because it meant I had to let go of what was in order to accept the call. I had to let go of an identity I had tied myself so closely to, and really, how so many others identified me with as well. That role of sharing the message that dogs with disabilities can live a quality life.

That will always be a part of me. But underneath my work with Frankie the Walk ‘N Roll Dog, my little dachshund in a wheelchair, that little light of mine was gaining new insights.  I was growing stronger in my confidence and my belief’s as a woman. 

As one of the women today talked about her own transformations over the years, it is her horses that brought her to the awakened place she is today. Tears sprung to my eyes as for me, it’s been my dogs. I wouldn’t be who I am today without opening to the lessons they were teaching me.

And while those lessons remain embedded in my heart, and I’ll always have room in my heart to love dogs, I’ve felt called to expand on who I am, (besides someone who loves animals deeply) and share that with others.

So my friend was right, I’m in transformation. Frankie and Joie (as well as my other dogs) gave me the courage to begin to test my wings to see what I was made of. And now I stand on my own.

It’s a place I want to be. But it also means I have to step out in other ways in order to continue to transform and do the work I wish to do, which is facilitating workshops for women – to be a guide in helping others to tap into their intuition, through creativity and connecting with nature and animals – and my belief that when we take more time to pause and listen to our soul, it will ultimately help us to live more meaningful lives.

Being in transition came the understanding of the importance of letting go and accepting. Now being in this stage of transformation means spreading my wings more fully and shining that light that is being called to shine in a new way.

I’m not alone. This I know. Women all around the world are feeling what they sometimes can’t put words to – but I believe it is that little light within you that wants more than anything to shine in your own brilliant way.

So on this International Women’s Day I celebrate each of you and say from the depths of my heart, Let that Beautiful Light of Yours Shine!

Strengthen your intuition through creativity to step more fully into your true essence. Self-paced, video course “Connect with Your True Essence through SoulCollage®.”  I’m here to support you with an optional private Facebook group with this course. Click here to learn more.

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