Three adjectives I used to describe Spider were creepy, dirty, and sneaky. This is what I shared with my friend and fellow author, Dawn, when she invited me to take part in an exercise she created to help with the fear others may carry about a particular animal which is in her new book that launched yesterday called, Shadow Animals.
What unfolded during that exercise is in chapter one of Dawn’s book. Like a Spider so beautifully and exquisitely spins a web, I’d come to realize that Spider and the adjectives I’d used were connected to my feelings from trauma as a young child.
I’d then recall how much I enjoyed the book and film as a child, Charlotte’s Web. It was Charlotte, the spider, who was so very kind to Wilbur the pig, reassuring him that everything was going to be okay. Watching that film around the time I’d gone through this exercise I’d realized how Spider had been an ally to me as a child assuring me that despite the trauma, I would be okay too.
When I received an advanced copy of Dawn’s book I realized I didn’t have a totem to honor the teaching I received from Spider. And so I set out to find something to do just that…
And I came upon this gorgeous beaded spider with a mandala as part of her body. She really spoke to me and she arrived today.
A mandala – a symbol in various spiritual traditions, often used for focusing attention and as a spiritual guidance tool to establish a sacred space or aid in meditation seemed so fitting for what Spider guided me in bringing to the surface as another layer of healing.
It’s when we can really be with that scared inner voice, listen with compassion, and allow ourselves to open to the insightful wisdom we carry within that we can shed layers of pain we either know are there or that may be hidden. Once recognized and acknowledged, how often we can set ourselves free from the angst that kept us bound too tight in a web that held us back from being our true self.
So this beautiful spider joins my Joyful Pause Cottage studio among the many other totem animals that have touched me in some shape or form. Welcome. I’m so glad you are here.
“Shadow Animals” by Dawn Baumann Brunke & my collaged card honoring Spider and her teaching and healing for me.
The song, “Me and My Shadow” popped into my mind and continued on an endless loop the morning after I finished reading the book, “Shadow Animals.”
In part the lyrics are:
“Me and my shadow
Strollin’ down the avenue
Me and my shadow
Not a soul to tell our troubles to.”
In this new thought-provoking and timely book, “Shadow Animals” by Dawn Brunke, the line “not a soul to tell our troubles to” brought forth a whole new meaning and expanded my love yet again for the animal world for all the wisdom and guidance they’ve provided me over the years.
It has been a deeply rewarding experience to have healed aspects of my shadow self because of the gentle, caring, and at times, loving persistence of the Animal Kingdom – especially those animals I held some fear about.
So it was an honor to be asked to take part in the chapter on arachnophobia and test a series of questions that Dawn developed that would help uncover clues about my angst about Spider. What it revealed and the insight that bubbled to the surface ushered in a welcome layer of healing!
As we continue to move through these challenging times of divisiveness and fear, it has become clear that the ones we really need to tell our troubles to are ourselves. That which triggers us and causes us pain or angst is an opportunity to go within and heal those shadow aspects of ourselves. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for!
And the animals – especially those we fear– called shadow animals – are the ones who can expand us in profound ways. They are here and waiting to walk lovingly beside us and inspire and encourage us to do the inner work to heal individually so that we may heal on a collective level also.
Dawn writes: “Shadow animals are unique teachers that can help us find and better understand the lost and wounded pieces of ourselves of which we are not fully aware. Some hold clues to repressed memories of trauma or abuse. Some are guides, helping us to explore the puzzling or guarded aspects of our psyche.”
Reading this book I found myself reaching for my Post-it™ note tabs over and over again, marking many passages that resonated, deeply moved me, or invited me to contemplate further. One such paragraph is from the chapter intriguingly titled, “Nightmare.”
Dawn says, “To consciously meet our nightmare invokes a deepened relationship between Shadow and self. What we find when we face our fears is often surprising. For beyond the face of fear we encounter a deeper presence. There, in the dark mirror, we see ourselves. Previously misunderstood aspects of who we are gaze back at us, no longer cloaked by fear but illuminated with wonder.”
The chapter goes on to share a short, but emotional dream Dawn had about a neglected and abused pony. I was moved to tears as I recognized once again that part of me that had suffered abuse as a young child.
She encourages us to ask these questions: “What is battered, damaged, abandoned, sick, or starved for attention within my self? What small, sad being is at last acknowledged as we open our arms to hold and love it? With care and attention, what might it become?”
While exploring the deeper recesses of our psyche is not always easy, it’s that deeper presence that Dawn speaks to that is the reward and once experienced changes us in a profound way.
From sharing the well-researched mythology and folklore and the origins of how many animals came to be deemed as “bad or evil,” plus meditations and simple, but powerful exercises, Dawn eloquently shows us how we can not only heal our wounds – a.ka. our shadow – but how we can also awaken and expand in the truth and bring back into the light the brilliant teachings of the Animal Kingdom.
And so Dawn’s new book, “Shadow Animals,” and the many years she has devoted to the extensive work and understanding of the animal world, I see as an exquisite gift and a wake-up call to our world at this crucial juncture.
The first step then is acknowledging we each have work to do. Then get yourself a copy of this book, take notes, do the exercises, and open yourself to the treasure that acknowledging our shadow is a way to deepen into a more peaceful place within. Most of all, welcome in the animals and share your fears and unhealed stories with them. They are waiting with the utmost love to guide us home to the heart of who we truly are.
So as I wind my way back to the lyrics that looped through my mind, I see “Me and My Shadow” along with the deeply insightful wisdom shared in Dawn’s brilliant new book, “Shadow Animals” as an invitation. An invitation to not fear our shadow, but instead befriend it, acknowledge it, integrate it, and dance in the wonder of it.
For the well-being of humans, animals, and the planet, I highly recommend this book as a way forward to living with more love and compassion not only for ourselves but for all beings.
xxx
You can read more and pre-order here.
You can also read chapter excerpts on Dawn’s website here.
I think St. Francis embodied the value of the inner journey and inner leader…
For most of my life, I feared the word leadership because I didn’t feel like a leader and it conjured up ideas of materialism and doing what you had to do at all costs to reach the ‘top of the ladder.’ Quite opposite of the simple life I truly love.
During the recent Animal Wisdom World Summit host, Dr. Cara Gubbins asked each speaker their thoughts on being a leader and what it is we need in terms of leadership for our world today.
It’s definitely a subject that conjures up many of us things we wish to see changed. But it’s also a call to look at ways in which we can become our own leader within.
Some thoughts that came from some of the speakers about leadership were:
Embrace our own inner leader and remember we aren’t alone. ~Tammy Billups
There are different kinds of leaders and this is what we need, along with understanding that not all leaders need to be human. ~Nancy Windheart
We need to embrace nature as part of our team. ~Maia Kincaid
I was especially touched by Nancy sharing that not all leaders need to be human. In my life, it’s been dogs and animals in the wild that have been some of my greatest teachers encouraging me to trust my inner leader.
Being a leader can indeed at times feel like we are alone because when we begin to step into who we are others may not like it.
But I’ve found that the more I embrace my inner leader, the more like-minded souls come into my world. This strengthens my well-being and gives me the courage to keep being who I am.
I enjoyed Maia sharing that we need to embrace nature as part of our team. Nature is such a perfect example of leadership that does not force but follows the rhythm of natural laws and a way of being that is kinder and gentler to body, mind, and spirit.
During my interview with Cara, she asked me if I saw myself as a leader. It took me a few moments to answer because many emotions overcame me.
It took me until 55 years old to finally see myself in this way, which was only two short years ago. At times it can still feel fresh and surreal as I continue to embody this way of being.
But I know now that being a leader is about being who I authentically am. Whether in a ‘big’ or ‘small’ way it’s about living from my true self for the sake of being that vibration in a world that so desperately needs for each of us to truly embrace who we are.
I paused before answering Cara’s question as I thought about all those that still don’t yet feel worthy and those that doubt their own inner leader. I know how painful and vulnerable this can feel. It was with great joy to declare that I AM a leader!
Despite any wounding from our past which can keep us stuck in believing we can’t be a leader, I hope I was able to instill in others through my voice and story, that they are worthy and can indeed live by the beat of their own drum.
Can you imagine the world if we all embraced our inner leader? It sends chill bumps up and down my spine just thinking about it. What a beautiful world it would be! This time we are going through, on our way to a New Earth, is one in which I hope we can continue to build upon the fact that we now more than ever is the time to embrace your inner leader.
So how do we begin to do this?
I believe it’s by doing the inner work, just as I’ve so often shared over the years here in my letters, my blog, and in my memoirs.
I believe it’s about understanding our pain and opening to the gifts in what we’ve gone through as that which has given us a strength we’d not possibly have had.
It’s about reaching out for support in working through those things we feel fear around so we can rest in a more peaceful space within ourselves.
The more I continue to do my own inner work, the more I’m able to stay rooted in who I know I am. The more I do this the more I have compassion for myself and for those around me. The more I love and respect myself, the more I want to continue to be the leader of my life.
I also believe that being the leader of our lives is about feeling all of life – even when it’s hard. Do I do this 100% all the time? No, I don’t. But being a leader I believe, also means not judging ourselves and trusting we will take what we’ve learned and do better next time.
And as speaker Dawn Brunke shared, “Everything is going to be okay. This is about evolution.”
Evolution individually, and as a collective, for a more peaceful world.
xo,
Barbara
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