I was awake at 5:00am today. As often happens to me, my mind began to fill with many thoughts.
Today I heard, “I want to write. I don’t have to write.” This thought kept swirling around and around in my mind. I knew I better get up and write this idea down before other thoughts invaded, and it evaporated into oblivion. I knew I’d want to write about this on my blog today. I also reminded myself that I’m trying to follow these impulses more often, so I told myself to get my butt out of bed now.
When I began writing in my early 40s for a local newspaper column, then started my blog, as well as books I’ve written, I read quite a bit about the art of writing. I wanted to do it right.
I often got caught up in the process of how other writers did it. When was their best time to write? How many pages or words did they write each day? Where did they write? Did they feel compelled and just had to write? Many books and blogs I read had the writer sharing they just have to write.
I wonder if wanting to, and having to, is perhaps the same thing? I suppose it’s all in how each writer defines it. But whenever I read that another writer just had to write and couldn’t miss a day of it, like not brushing their teeth, it never really truly resonated with me.
This morning it was as if I had my own aha moment after writing for almost ten years now on a pretty consistent basis. I want to write.
It’s not like I didn’t already know this, but I feel like I now have more clarification. Clarity is a good thing. I want to write to make a difference. To bring my thoughts and observations to those that need to hear most what I have to say.
As I’ve shared before on my blog, which became even more clear to me after my sabbatical, I want to encourage and inspire others. This is what makes me feel alive– to know in some small way, through my writing, I’m making the life of someone else just a little bit better.
I’ve heard from so many of you who follow my blog, on Facebook, or have read, Through Frankie’s Eyes how sharing my story and my thoughts has helped, or resonated with you. This means to much so me. I’m truly grateful when you reach out to me and share your thoughts. It encourages and inspires me to keep writing.
I don’t have to write, but I want to write. Writing is my small way of bringing some positive, peace, and meaning to a world that sometimes loses sight of these things.
No longer do I have the need to find the right way to write. I may not be grammatically correct and don’t put comma’s in exactly the right place, along with a slew of other English proper’s that really never made any sense to me (this is why I love my editor when I write my books). But I want to write. I want to write from my truth and my heart.
This is part of who I am. Having a deeper clarity present itself to me like this today makes me happy to once again have my butt planted firmly in my chair and writing this moment. Writing in a way that is right for me.
