I’ve had a pivotal shift.
It might be viewed as a bittersweet letting go, but I’m not seeing it in this way.
When Gidget came to live with me I consulted with my animal communicator friend, Dawn, and had a reading done with Gidget.
I was wondering what perhaps the deeper meaning of our coming together was about. Meaning, what did I need to learn from her and her from me?
Having had many teachings from my pets to date I welcome being open to more lessons that can help me live a more meaningful life.
From the reading with Dawn I came to understand Gidget was in my life to help keep me grounded. Interestingly enough, I am in her life to help her do the same.
When Gidget came to our home over four years ago I’d define her as anxious and fidgety. There was an insecure side to her also and she had a difficult time when I’d leave the house. And might I add I have/had the same tendencies? 🙂 While her tendencies are still true in some aspects, I’ve noticed a shift in her.
A few weeks ago, as I usually do each morning after she eats her breakfast, I scoop Gidget up from under her blanket on her bed in the kitchen, and off to my Zen writing cottage we go for my yoga practice.
But something stopped me this day. I didn’t want to disturb her and had this selfish feeling come over me for having done so since she has been with me.
While I love having her with me, I wondered if this wanting her near me often was more about myself. And that day I decided to let go – to stop trying to control where or when she decided to be with me.
And you know what happened? She stays cuddled under her blanket in the kitchen when I do my yoga practice in my writing cottage. In some ways this has been difficult for me because I miss her and miss seeing her sweet face as I move through my practice.
But I’m also realizing it is a lesson for me to stop trying to control things. Gidget has her own agenda too and should be allowed to express that.
Interestingly enough I had this realization reflected back to me when visiting a friend recently. When I pulled in her driveway I saw a cat walking toward me. I thought it was a stray as I’d never seen my friend’s cats out in the yard before.
My friend came outside to greet me and I said, “Is that a stray cat?” She smiled and said no, it was her cat. Recently having returned from a retreat and she realized she had been trying to control her cat from going outside when she knew in her heart that is what he wanted.
When she surrendered to letting go, she was pleasantly surprised that trusting in what was right for her cat would be okay. And it is. He loves to explore during the day and comes home later in the day. And their relationship has deepened.
And so it is with Gidget. I’m learning to let go and not hold on so tightly. I know in the past my dogs like a security blanket for me, but also my greatest teachers of learning to step into who I am.
I’m sensing that by my letting go it helps Gidget to learn to feel grounded within herself and dang if that isn’t a mirror to my own grounding that I need, too.
And to add to this beautiful teaching this morning when I came into the house from my yoga practice? Miss Gidget came running from the kitchen to me in a full-out body wiggle. Oh, how my heart exploded!
While she was happy to have her alone time, she was now ready to connect with me, and I with her. What a sweet, sweet deal.
And just after writing this post, then having some lunch, Gidget decided being in Kylie’s kennel is where she’d rather be this afternoon.
And so I learn to let go again and honor her wishes.
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