inner journey

Channeling my Inner Flying Nun

Posted by Barbara Techel

Who needs wings to fly?
Certainly not I,
I prefer to take up on the breeze,
Follow any swallow that may please my fancy.

I just close my eyes,
Tiptoe through the skies,
Long as there’s a habit standing by,
Who needs things like wings to fly?

~Lyrics from The Flying Nun

Many mornings last week I found myself grumbling under my breath upon waking to see the trees blowing in the gusty winds. I wanted it to be calm for my morning walk. I didn’t want to fight the wind. And so some days I didn’t walk.

Today it was windy yet again. But this time I decided to not fight against what was. So I bundled up and out the door I went. These days I truly walk more for my mental health than anything else and when I don’t get in a walk my energy feels different – not as energized.

Upon returning home today I caught my reflection in the storm door. With my hood up, I felt as if it looked like I was wearing a nun’s habit and I felt as if I’d just channeled my inner Flying Nun!

I posted the above photo on my Facebook page and my thoughts about my hood feeling like a habit and channeling my inner nun. My mom commented she was pondering my thoughts. Perhaps not seeing and feeling what I did.

A friend posted the opening line from The Flying Nun, Who needs wings to fly? Certainly not I, I prefer to take up on the breeze…immediately I heard myself inwardly say, “Yes!”

Though I found myself feeling bothered that my mom didn’t understand what I was seeing and feeling. I admit I felt deflated for a few moments. But then I paused and sat with what I was feeling. I realized I was falling back into an old pattern. I didn’t feel heard or understood. Though I know this wasn’t my mom’s intention. It was my projection. It was also just something she wasn’t perceiving as I did. Nothing right or wrong about it.

It didn’t mean that what I felt and saw in the reflection in the door that morning was wrong. But how often is it that we wish to be understood? Especially by those we really love.

But again, I realized it was my projection and it was just that my mom didn’t see what I saw. This was perfectly okay. It was up to me to not let that take away from the truth of what I’d been feeling – and more importantly – the magic of what I’d felt coming home to seeing myself as The Flying Nun.

And why did I feel like I was channeling my inner Flying Nun? And why did I see my hood up over my hat and head as a habit that nuns wear? Well, that along with my friend sharing the opening line of The Flying Nun lyrics really had my mind flying (pun intended) in a flow of excitement wanting to go deeper with this…

It begins with the fact I made the choice today to go with the flow of Mother Nature and not against it. My hood up over my head and hat created this safe and cozy sanctuary against the element of the wind. I was contained within myself but yet a part of the elements.

Researching the habits the nuns wore in The Flying Nun TV series I discovered they were called cornettes.

According to Wikipedia, a cornette is a piece of female headwear. It is essentially a type of wimple consisting of a large, starched piece of white cloth that is folded upwards in such a way as to create the resemblance of horns on the wearer’s head. 

The cornette was retained as a distinctive piece of clothing into modern times by the Daughters of Charity, a Roman Catholic society of apostolic life founded by St. Vincent de Paul in the mid-17th century. The founder wanted to have the sisters of this new type of religious congregation of women, that tended to the sick and poor, and were not required to remain in their cloister, resemble ordinary middle-class women as much as possible in their clothing, including the wearing of the cornette.

It is said that the cornette worn by Sister Bertrille (The Flying Nun), that due to her being light in weight and the heavily starched cornette is what gave her the ability to fly.

Then from IMDB.com along came the episode in 1969 where: The Mother General has issued an edict for the sisters to wear a new habit. The sisters are all thrilled by the new, modern habit, that is until one by one they all realize that the new cornette with which will no longer allow Sister Bertrille to fly. Not only is Sister Bertrille devastated by the fact, but all the sisters are as well.

But as the plot continues it ends with The Mother General having the sisters returning to wearing the old habits once again.

This means Sister Bertrille could fly once again! But isn’t it interesting to note that we can all fly, no matter what, if we just remember the truth of who we are? And how we sometimes let our projections or old patterning, or that of not feeling heard or understood deflate our wings?

I’m also pondering my feeling connected to The Flying Nun played by Sally Field, who also played in another TV series called Gidget. And it will be two years next week since my dachshund named Gidget, petite and sweet just like Sally Field who played Gidget, will be gone.

While my pint-sized doxie was oh-so-sweet, she was also a light warrior and master teacher who guided me to finally accept a memory of a childhood trauma that haunted me for over two decades. As I walked through that self-healing journey, I came to realize I was, and will always be, worthy just as I am.

I don’t need a heavily starched cornette to fly nor do I need to wear a habit to feel safe. But it’s by continuing to do my inner work when I feel not heard or understood, digging into why that is, that I can course-correct old patterning. This is what gives me the ability to fly!

Who needs wings to fly? Certainly not I, I prefer to take up on the breeze…I just close my eyes,
Tiptoe through the skies…

Connecting in with my higher self and with the universe I give myself permission to explore all my feelings, reminding myself to do so without judgment, and remembering I’m always being supported by something bigger than me that has my best interest in mind at all times.

I close my eyes, connecting with the stars, the sky, the Divine, and the breeze of all that is brings me back home to the center of love and all that I am. This is the space I strive to be in more often where life isn’t a struggle, but a gift that reminds me that yes, I can indeed fly.

XO,

Barb

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Our Alchemist Eyes

Posted by Barbara Techel

We wait, starving for moments of high magic to inspire us, but life is a banquet of common enchantment waiting for our alchemists’ eyes to notice. ~Jacob Nordby

Sometimes it can feel like it takes a long time to go through a transformational process. How often we dismiss the sacred time within the bud. This is where all the magic happens. The changes that occur during metamorphic times are usually those that leave a lasting impact on our lives.

I couldn’t help but think of this on Saturday as I noticed the buds on my Weeping Cherry Tree. By Saturday, many of the buds had opened into sweet, small blossoms.

Each stage holds its own beauty and wisdom. I want to continue to see life in this way.

XO

Barb

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Nurturing Inside and Out. My Soon to Be Raised Bed Garden.

Posted by Barbara Techel

Kind words are the gardens, kind words are the roots, kind words are the flowers, kind deeds are the fruits, take care of your garden and keep out the weeds, Fill it with sunshine, kind words, and kind deeds. ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Nurturing seems to be a topic on my mind lately. From my post on Sunday sharing about my nurturing Gidget’s memorial marker where she lays resting outside Joyful Pause Cottage to now thinking about it in terms of gardening.

I also just finished recording an excerpt from each chapter of my memoir, I’m Fine Just the Way I Am, and I’ll be releasing one a day beginning on May 11th – the two-year mark since Gidget has been gone. As I write this post my YouTube channel is busy at work uploading all the chapter excerpts. It was quite the task, but I felt strongly called to do this creative project in honor of Gidget. Another way in which I continue to nurture her many gifts to me and sharing them with others in the hope they will be beneficial for the healing journey of others. 

Gidget was my mirror to listen to the little girl within me that had been in pain for many, many years, but stuffed it down for fear of not being heard, understood, or believed. But as I’d come to realize it was the now-adult version of me that had to listen. From that listening, I learned how to nurture that small child within me. To hold her, soothe her, and let her know it was all going to be okay.

Yesterday I recorded an excerpt from the chapter titled No Place Like Home. This chapter is when I realize all the inner work I’d done as I healed the pain from a childhood trauma was now reflecting in my home. John and I were remodeling the kitchen and living room. We took out a partial wall from between the kitchen and living room, painted the walls a light gray, and changed to soft tones of beige, blue and green colors for the living room furniture from the dark teal, green and maroon they were.

When we take care of our inner world the outside world of our existence takes care of itself.

Sunday as I perused a home decor magazine which is one of my favorite things to do, I came across the quote by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

In between my project of recording the book excerpts I’ve been planning for a raised bed garden — a first for me. Years and years ago we had a garden plot in our yard dug by rototiller, but then it fell to the wayside — as the busyness of life can sometimes steal right from under you.

But this new way of gardening with raised beds really appealed to me. If I start small, I thought, I can manage it more easily and add more the following year if I wish. Scouring the internet I found this 4 x 4 raised bed plan I fell in love with. I especially love the bench on each side. Nice for sitting to plant seeds, weed, and pick the crops when ready, while appealing to the eye. But I’m also envisioning it as a lovely place to just sit and relax sometimes.

I purchased organic seeds from Everwilde Farms and after receiving them realized I’d forgotten to order spinach and swiss chard. In the back of my mind, I worried I wouldn’t have enough room for everything I want to plant thinking I’d just have to plant some things in containers.

It was a few hours later when John mentioned that we should perhaps make the garden 4 x 8 instead. He had calculated out the cost for additional cedar and it didn’t add too much more to the total. I had my confirmation that the plans I had for the additional seeds I needed to get were a go-ahead!

Today as I dream more about this new experience of having a raised bed garden the thought of nurturing trickled through my mind again. As I continue to nurture my relationship with Gidget even though she is no longer here physically, I’m reminded of her potent teaching to continue to nurture my inner world.

As I plant vegetable seeds I nurture my connection to the earth and nature. As I harvest the crops I help to nurture the insides of our bodies with good food, which helps nurture our minds and spirit. This brings me full circle back to the quote above — and how when we take care of our inner world, the outside world by default reflects this back in the most beautiful way.

XO,

Barb

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