Being Open to Unexpected Messengers that Cross Your Path

Being Open to Unexpected Messengers that Cross Your Path
Some of my writing companions when home in my Zen writing cottage

I had time to kill between an early morning meeting Tuesday at a coffeehouse before my scheduled talk with a book club two and half hours later at the same place.

Taking advantage of getting some writing done away from home I settled into a spot with my laptop on a small table and looking out over the river. The winds were howling and leaves danced outside the large glass windows as I held a hot cup of orange blossom tea to warm my hands and insides.

As much as I wanted to work on my book, Wisdom Found in the Pause, I found myself procrastinating. It was also my 31st wedding anniversary and I was feeling the pull to write a blog post about it – a thought having just flickered across my mind.

I honored my impulse and after sharing my post on Facebook, I got caught up in what else was happening in the world according to Facebook.

A few moments later I looked up to see a gentleman I know coming down the stairs from the loft that is part of the quaint coffeehouse.

I waved and he walked over. We chatted a few moments about life in general and he asked me if John was busy with his construction business. He then asked me if I was working on a new book. I told him, that yes, I am.

While I don’t know him all that well, the few times I’ve had the pleasure of talking with him, he is one of those people who really listens when someone talks. I’ve just always sensed that in him and it’s such a gift.

I shared with him how it is two years this month since I began, taking me longer to finish than my other books have.

He said, “Well, I imagine, writing the way you do, sharing your feelings and thoughts which are so personal, it can’t always be easy and takes time to work through.”

I swear he was reading my mind as this has been how I’ve felt writing this book, even more so than my first memoir.

He offered the advice that he felt this was likely part of the process as a way in which I worked – getting comfortable in writing what I have and getting ready to feel comfortable in releasing it for others to read.

He was spot on. As I’ve written recently here I’m understanding more about my own process and getting comfortable in what is right for me – not necessarily how others may write or publish – but how it fits for me.

I also often revisit why I write. While yes, I never want to lose money publishing, and of course, as most people who write a book would like to make a little money from sales, I write because it is how I process things.

If what I write can help another person, well, that is what makes my work most fulfilling and rewarding. When this occurs, it lights me up inside to keep on going.

After we said our goodbyes and he walked away, I found I could hardly wait to open the folder on my laptop that contains my manuscript.

I realized then that he was a messenger sent to encourage me. And in doing so my procrastinator had no choice but to get up and move on.

His words of wisdom soothed this writers heart and were just what I needed to get my fingers flying across the keyboard once again.

Writing and publishing can oftentimes feel vulnerable, which I see now as part of the process — and part of life no matter what. I’m honored to share a piece I wrote called “Vulnerability: A Gift to be Embraced” published on this month on a wonderful site, Rumblstrips.

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Reflecting on 31 Years. One Important Thing I’ve Learned About Being Married.

Reflecting on 31 Years. One Important Thing I’ve Learned About Being Married.

Today John and I are celebrating our 31st wedding anniversary. When this time rolls around each year I am always in awe on how quickly the years fly by. Time has become all the more precious.

I’m also so very grateful for having spent all these years with one of the greatest guys on the planet.

One thing I’m reflecting on today is the idea of gifts.

In our earlier years, presents were something I expected from John. I also often wanted him to just know what it was I wanted. When this didn’t happen it was oftentimes cause of angst and anger.

Oh, how I wished I had known better. It wasn’t about the gifts at all. It was about feeling understood.

All these years later I realize I got the best gift of all. A husband who truly understands me… and at times when he isn’t sure, he gives it his all in understanding and letting me be me.

Because of John as my partner in his oftentimes quiet, taking it all in, understanding way, I’ve been able to grow into the woman I am today.

I am without a doubt much stronger because of him. While he’s taken in lessons from me, I have gained so much from him, too.

This is the gift. It always was all along. I’m so glad I see that more clearly today, 31 years later.

I posted a photo of our wedding day on Facebook and someone asked me what the secret to a long, happy marriage is.

Well, it’s not always happy, that’s the thing too. But even when it’s not, it’s the foundation that you build that you know in your heart that you will always come back to love and why you came together in the first place.

A foundation of love, understanding, patience, give and take… rinse and repeat….rinse and repeat….rinse and repeat.

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On Being a Dog. Human’s Listen Up.

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I admit that I’m sometimes a little over protective with Gidget. Being so tiny, at 10 lbs. I worry a bit more about her than I do Kylie, my Lab of 80 lbs.

It’s another gorgeous November day in Wisconsin, which by the forecast looks like it will come to an end later today, and colder temperatures, wind and rain more typical of November will be setting in.

Taking advantage of the sun and high 50s, I took Kylie and Gidget for a walk on a favorite route of mine. It winds around an athletic field with a wooded area bordering three sides of it, which I sometimes walk the dogs through too. But today we stayed on the path around the field.

One section we always walk by has three large trees, each with a split rail fence around them because they are each in somewhat of a ravine. I’ve never let Gidget off leash in this area, though Kylie is free to explore.

But in working on myself and learning to let Gidget be all dog more often, I dropped the leash so she could romp through the leaves and smell just about every blade of grass just like Kylie often does.

It really was fun watching her check out the world around her on her own without me hovering too close by. Though I admit, I did get a little nervous when she got too close to this tree where the ravine drops quite a ways down.

But I reminded myself that this is when trust has to come into play. I gently called out her name and her wee little ears perked up as she quickly glanced my way. And then off she went in a flash in a new direction, exploring new territory.

I smiled. I then stopped to really check in with how I felt in that moment, realizing how good it felt to let her be Dog which according to the Animal Wisdom Tarot, Dog is “scampering, jumping, digging, barking—Dog delights in everything, playfully prompting us to join the adventure, love wholeheartedly, and have fun in all we do. Dog reminds us that we are on the right path and life is good.”

And that’s the thing. I let go of my own fears and insecurities and trusted in what Gidget knows best in her world of Dog. And that world of which she lives from, opened up to me. And she was right. We were on the right path and life is good.

It actually felt even better than good–it was grand!

Letting go of my worries made it possible for me to understand Gidget even more and to deepen into her world without fear, and to trust that all is well.

I’m really glad I listened today and I plan to be much better at this going forward. I imagine Gidget agreeing and saying, “You silly human, I’m just fine!”

Okay, little one, I hear you. And I promise to be better at letting you be Dog.

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