canine cancer

Meet One of My Favorite Authors, Jackie Bouchard. Loved Talking to Her about Her New Book, “Rescue Me, Maybe?”

Jackie&Rita-B&W 1200Author Jackie Bouchard and her adorable Rita

Today I’d like to welcome author, Jackie Bouchard to my blog. I discovered Jackie over a year ago when I read her debut novel, What the Dog Ate. I enjoyed it so much I could hardly stand the anticipation of another book by her.

Well, that day came this past September when she contacted me and asked if I would review her new novel, Rescue Me, Maybe? I was thrilled!  After reading it, which you can read my review here, I knew I’d want to interview Jackie and share her with all of you.

Without further ado, my interview with Jackie!

Welcome Jackie!  First of all, where do you get your sense of humor?

I definitely get it from my family. I’m the youngest of 6 kids, and my siblings and I all bust each other up. My dad also loved to laugh, and loved to tell bad jokes. I think he remembered every dumb joke he ever heard! Also, I’m just not sure you can survive 12 years of Catholic school if you don’t have a sense of humor! Especially if you attended back in the days when the nuns were allowed to hit us with rulers.

Where did the idea come from to write Rescue Me, Maybe?

Cover-Rescue-Me-Maybe-Final-Med

The basic idea for the story is based on how my own dog, Abby, changed me. When we had our first dog Bailey, I used to say she was like a cat in a beagle suit. She didn’t really care about meeting new people or other dogs. She liked other people when she did meet them, but she didn’t go out of her way to greet people. As for dogs, she didn’t like them, so we would steer clear when I’d walk her. And that suited me fine, because I’m shy about meeting new people anyway. But when we got Abby, she LOVED everyone and wanted to go meet everyone! I was suddenly having to stop and chat with neighbors I’d never talked to before, because Abby would drag me, wiggling and happy, over to meet them. I also read an essay by a self-described “ol’ meanie” who got a super adorable dog and he wrote about how that irresistible pup forced him to interact with – and be friendly to – other people. I thought it would be interesting to write about a character who was changed by the dog she rescues.

Of course, just adopting a happy-go-lucky dog is not really enough meat for a whole novel, but as Abby’s story progressed, it gave me plenty of things to use as fodder for the novel. In the end, I wanted the book to be an homage to her and how special she was.

It’s no secret your new novel takes on a more serious note (though still some subtle humor) since it is about losing a spouse and a dog to cancer within weeks of each other.  What made you want to tackle these tough subjects?

020507 WetDogBailey

I actually didn’t want to tackle those tough subjects! But when our beagle, Bailey, died I found writing about a character dealing with the death of her dog was the best means for me to cope with missing Bailey. To add a twist to the story, I decided the main character’s husband would also have just died. Since we’ve dealt with cancer in two of our dogs, and I’ve made so many friends who’ve been in the same situation, it was – unfortunately – a subject that was close to my heart. After all, they do advise to “write what you know.”

I know the character of the dog. Maybe, was based on your own dog, Abby, who had special needs. As you know, that resonated with me because of my dog Frankie who was in a wheelchair due to disc disease. I faced similar situations. Can you talk more about those challenges and share your wish in helping others understand more about animals with special needs?

Abby-resized

Abby

Oh… the challenges. The challenges were almost entirely for me, not for her! Abby had to have her leg amputated at only 15 months old, because she had bone cancer. I was so worried about everything – would she recover okay, would we still be able to go on long walks at the beach, would the other dogs make fun of her. (Okay, maybe I didn’t worry about that last one. Or… only for a minute or two.) But she just dealt with it – and she dealt with it with supreme grace and a joy-for-life verve that was inspiring to see. That’s what I want people to know about animals with special needs – that they don’t feel sorry for themselves, and we shouldn’t either. They teach us so much about how to handle ourselves, and that we shouldn’t be so self-conscious, even if we think we’re “different” from everyone else!

Jane also struggles with admitting to others that she is sadder about the loss of her dog than her spouse. Do you think this happens often? Why do you think that is?

You know, I didn’t think that happened often… until I started talking to people about the book. I thought I was making up something unique, and even funny in a “dark humor” sort of way. I would be devastated if I lost my husband, so I guess the idea seemed foreign to me that a woman would be sadder about her dog. But then I heard from a lot of people who either knew women like that, or WERE that woman, or had been her at one time. So, now I’m thinking this might be a common situation! As for why that is… I can only guess, but I assume it’s partly because our dogs love us so unconditionally. Sometimes we hide bits of ourselves from others, even loved ones, because we think we’re not deserving of love. But you don’t have to hide anything with a pet. They love you, listen to you, and stick by you no matter what. I can see where it would be easy to fall into a pattern of not appreciating your spouse, and taking them for granted – or feeling like they take you for granted. Whereas – who’s going to love you as much as your dog does? Your dog will never take you for granted – it’s always pure joy for them when you return. That kinda love is hard to lose!

What is it that you want readers to take away from reading “Rescue Me, Maybe?”

I hope they feel happy and hopeful at the end, and that they look at their own life and think about how they can make the most of it. It’s not always easy to remember to do that, when we’re all so busy, but try to take a moment every day to appreciate the things you have and look for the beauty and love around you.

Your bio says you were “trapped in the hamster wheel of corporate America,” but you were lucky enough to escape to pursue your love of writing. I’m always fascinated by others doing this, as I am one of them. Any advice for others yearning to do the same thing?

Well, I was lucky to be able to “escape.” I’m a very practical person, so always did what was practical. Even though I felt like a creative type deep down, I got an accounting degree, knowing jobs would always be available. And they were, and they were good-paying jobs, so I was able to escape because I put in my time working and saving up money. And, of course, being married to someone who still has a job with benefits helps! I think everyone has to find their path to what gives them joy. Unfortunately, it’s not always something that you can make money from – or, you can make some money, but not enough to live on. So, even if you can’t afford to escape from what you consider to be a “grind” of a job, hopefully you have ways to bring joy into your life by other means. In my first book, “What the Dog Ate,” the main character says that accounting “feeds her bank account, but not her soul.” But in our society sometimes we do have to feed that bank account! Just don’t forget to feed your soul too, whether that’s through your work, an artistic endeavor, your hobbies, or volunteering. Wouldn’t it be nice if we all had fat, happy souls from being fed so much?!

What is your writing routine like?

My writing routine is…odd. When I really get going on something, I barely stop to get up and get a drink of water. I get really nutty and end up with back and arm pain because I’m practically glued to my desk! {**Remembers that she’s been sitting at desk for hours. Stops and stretches, as advised by chiropractor!**} Okay, I’m back. Anyway, because of that, I don’t write every day. I usually take the weekends off to spend time with my husband, and on weekdays, I try to get everything else out of the way first (walk the dog, answer emails, blog, run errands, work out, etc.) because I know once I start writing, it’s likely that nothing else will get done. Usually by the time everything else is done, it’s mid-afternoon, so I’ll write until the hubs calls to say he’s on his way home from work. It’s pretty hap-hazard and not a routine that I’d recommend! Also, I’m one of the odd writers who loves to revise! I find it hard to sit down and write new stuff, but give me something to revise and I’m happy to spend hours obsessing over it. My love of going back and revising makes it tough to get a first draft completed!

You share your life with Rita, a rescue dog. Can you tell us more about her? What is your favorite endearing quality about her?  What drives you crazy and tests your patience?  J

We rescued Rita from the Baja Animal Sanctuary. As far as we know, she’s a shepherd/beagle mix – or a sheagle, as I call her. She looks so much like our two angels got together and had a puppy that we had to have her! One of my favorite things about her is that she loves to sleep in! We like to sleep in on the weekends, so it’s so great that she’s perfectly happy to just hang out, snuggling with us. On the other hand… the way she sometimes can be reactive to other dogs when she’s on leash, or to strangers when they come to the house can test my patience! She definitely has some issues from her past, being found on a beach in Mexico. We’re working on it, and she’s getting better, but sometimes it’s embarrassing. Like when my husband had a work colleague over – a very tall man. Rita hates big men! She barked at him every time he moved. It was a long night.

Of course you know I’m going to ask you this question: Are you working on another novel? If so, any hints for us and what it is about? Pretty please?

Yes, I am working on book #3. It’s hard to talk about a book that’s in progress (or even one that’s done!) because it’s so difficult to distill 90,000 words down into a sentence or two. Also, I’m not one to plot things out in advance, so sometimes I don’t know what a book is “about” until I’m very far into the process! (I don’t recommend working this way!) But I will say that I think it’s about how we can be so judgmental of each other and also about living up to expectations (your own and others’). I’m trying to tell that story through the character of a woman who is a dog-mom, and she and her sister (who is an actual mom) don’t get along very well!

Anything else you’d like to share?

The only other thing that I’d like to mention is to let your readers know that I’ve pledged to donate a portion of the profits on sales of “Rescue Me, Maybe” to Morris Animal Foundation. I think they’re a great organization and they fund research into canine cancer, which is a topic that I care a lot about!

You can order Rescue Me, Maybe? on Amazon.  Makes a great Christmas gift too for the dog lovers on your list.

Here is where you can find Jackie:

Website

Blog

Facebook

Book Trailer for Rescue Me, Maybe?

Because She Wasn’t JUST a Dog by Nadine M. Rosin

When I read this article written by Nadine M. Rosin, I knew I needed to share with you, my readers.  Nadine and I have connected in the past, so she most graciously agreed to let me share with you.  Thank you, Nadine… so much.


Because She Wasn’t JUST a Dog

“ “Thank you so much for thinking of me, Jennifer, but I really don’t feel like going out to dinner this weekend.”

“But Nadine, it’s your birthday– we have to celebrate!”

I gripped the phone receiver even tighter in my hand. I knew Jennifer’s intentions were good and caring, and like many of my other friends, she felt uncomfortable, confused and impotent when it came to what appeared to be my refusal to get on with my life.

Several weeks later, I sat alone in front of the TV, paying only the slightest attention to the coverage of Ronald Reagan’s funeral. As I watched the motorcade wind its way through the California hills across my screen, I felt wrenchingly sad, but it wasn’t because of Ronald Reagan’s death. Just a few months earlier, I’d weathered the one-year anniversary of my dog, Buttons’ passing. For the last year, I’d somehow survived not only being without her physical presence for the first time in almost 2 decades, but also the inevitable, “Why don’t you go get another dog?” or “Aren’t you over it yet? She was JUST a dog!” from many well-intentioned friends.

Every pet parent who’s ever had a heart-dog knows, Buttons wasn’t just a dog. She was my best friend, my partner in crime, my greatest teacher and my adopted daughter. We’d lived all over the United States: Chicago, Tucson, Santa Cruz, and been together for 19 years. She was there to comfort me when my fiancé broke our engagement, and I was there to help her heal and become an 11-year cancer survivor on all natural remedies. No, she wasn’t just a dog… she was the love of my life.

As Nancy Reagan sat silently staring at her husband’s coffin, I felt myself getting agitated. The familiar voice of a famous network newscaster had launched into a commentary praising Mrs. Reagan up one side and down the other for her incredibly admirable stoicism. I, on the other hand, just wanted to reach through the screen and shake Nancy by the shoulders, “QUIT HOLDING IT IN,” I wanted to shout at her. “It’s natural to cry and feel pain! You’re creating disease in your body by holding in all that emotion!” But instead, there on the couch, I dissolved into my own heartbroken tears.

Was something really wrong with me because I wasn’t “over it yet”… because I was so very far from being admirably stoic? Not only did I hurt almost nonstop with longing for my sweet doggy, but I had no desire to go anywhere or see anyone. No one was comfortable around my grief and it just took so much energy for me to pretend everything was normal in front of them- that my whole world hadn’t been shattered. For me, the thought of getting another dog at that point felt like a traitorous act. People didn’t understand, I didn’t want to wallow in my pain, I wanted to honor it and let it breathe. I wanted to honor Buttons and all our years together. Was that really such a bad thing?

Some weeks later, I sat once again alone in front of my TV. This time, it was to join the rest of the world in watching the horrible aftermath of the Beslan school hostage crisis. Three hundred and thirty-four hostages were killed including 186 children. I watched, nearly mesmerized as parents and grandparents- grown men and women, threw themselves weeping and wailing on the coffins of their sons and daughters, siblings, nieces and nephews. They held nothing in, but outwardly expressed their unbelievable pain. Sure, it was messy- all that unedited grief and emotion, and in my own heart, I knew it was also really healthy… healthy, authentic grieving.

And so more and more everyday, I took my cue from those brave Russian people. I stopped trying to distract myself and make myself feel better. I no longer told myself it was time to get over it already. Instead, I began leaning even deeper into my pain. I gave myself permission to feel everything as I gave my mourning free and total rein.

There were times when I feared that my seemingly endless tears would destroy me. There were times when I prayed that they would. But at one point, lost in all that emotional messiness and tumult, something totally unexpected happened: the agony merged with what felt like ecstasy.

When I rode it to its depth, my grief catapulted me into the ever-present moment. No past, no future, just the eternal now- where everything is always ok. Where, when the mind stops thinking and spewing its endless chatter, dialogue, and commentary, and all there is, is love.

I had found the gift that had been waiting for me deep inside all that grief: the experience of the depth of my pain being in direct proportion to the depth of my love. And then I knew. Buttons hadn’t left me at all- she hadn’t gone anywhere. The part of her that really mattered was right there in my heart, where the only true solace resides. What had been required of me, was my having to surrender fully to the pain, in order to find her again. Because the truth was, it was never JUST pain… and my girl, Buttons was never, JUST a dog.”

©2010 Nadine M. Rosin Posted here with written permission of the author

Nadine M. Rosin is a certified holistic pets/toxic-free living consultant, pet bereavement facilitator and author of The Healing Art of Pet Parenthood a true story about the human-animal bond, healing cancer holistically, senior canine care, and an empowering new take on the grieving process when a beloved animal passes away. Available on Amazon and all online book retailers. Can be ordered worldwide through any brick & mortar bookstore.