“Its hard to tell the truth, but once told, it’s hard to keep it back.” ~Sharon Green
My brother, 9-years younger than me, became a soldier at 38-years old. Joined the National Guards, quit smoking, went off to boot camp and followed his heart just last year.
A troubled young man for much of his youth – in what seems an instant, he changed and went after what he wanted for his life. I couldn’t be more proud.
Our difference in age had me not much involved with his life- but it never meant I didn’t love him or care about him. We lived our own lives- finding our own way. That has always seemed to be an understanding between us.
Little did I know that by finding his courage to join the National Guards at what most would say was “too old” he would recently help me build my courage to share some truth I had been holding in for quite some time.
A truth that was hard for me because I realized how deep it ran for me to not want to disappoint others, but now facing full on that I had only been disappointing myself. It was, and still is, a hard place for me to be… but I’m beginning to see the light of some blessings that have come to light.
My “little” brother leaves for overseas soon, after the holidays, and will be gone for a year. Though the war is “officially” over it is still a risk. One he is willing to take for what he believes in. That risk he believes in led him to wanting to clear up other issues in his life before he leaves, which helped led me to clear some issues too. Though still painful for me, it is a gift, I realize… he helped me to speak my truth… which I can feel in time will only lead me down the road to more of who I am. I can feel it, but not quite see it, but I know it’s there. I truly believe he helped take me a step further in my evolution. For that I am grateful. Truly and deeply grateful.
My “little” brother who may have thought he didn’t have validation in what he had to say for so many years gave me another piece of courage to live more fully into what I want for my life. So I want to be sure to say thank you the only way I know how, which is through my writing. Thank you. Thank you. May God be with you as you travel afar and know you will be held tightly in my heart. Godspeed.
“This brings rest to my heart. I feel like a leaf after a storm, when the wind is still.” ~Petalasharo, Pawnee from 365 Days of Walk the Red Road, The Native American Path to Leading A Spiritual Life Every Day.”
