personal growth

The Making of a Prayer Box and The Water Horse

The Making of a Prayer Box and The Water Horse

This past Sunday I spent the afternoon collaging and painting an old wooden box into a prayer box while watching The Water Horse – Legend of the Deep. 

As I mentioned a few blog posts ago, I have some family members and a dear friend going through some health challenges right now. It has left me feeling helpless at times and wondering what it is I can “do” to be of support.

The thing is, I know we must each walk our own journey and that we must also honor each person’s journey even when we feel like we wish there was something we could do to take away their challenging time. Balancing our own needs with wanting to help and respecting the dignity and choices of other’s can be a fine line to walk. 

Earlier this year going through a dark night of the soul myself, I came to feel Spirit envelop me for the first time in my life. I continue to be more comfortable with saying Spirit as I see this higher power as this swirling, right beside me, within and outside of me, as energy rather than sometimes labeled as male and/or God. But I came to understand that Spirit, even in those dark moments, was there for me.

And what if what my family members and my friend who are going through this difficult time could come to this same feeling and understanding of Spirit as I did this year? I’d certainly want that for them. Maybe that is how I can best support them and hold this in my heart and in my prayers.

And so the idea of creating this prayer box was born…I didn’t have any idea of what it would look like when it was complete, but just followed what felt right as I dug through decorative papers, paints, and pictures from magazines.

While I still think I may add something to it, though not sure what that is yet, I posted a photo of it on Facebook with this note: Spent the afternoon collaging this wooden box as a prayer box. With many I know going through a difficult time right now, I will add each of their names to the box as a way of holding space, love, light and peace for each of them.

Ronnie left a comment: Beautifully created…sincere& beautiful wishes. But how does light get into a closed box?

I found the question so intriguing! And so I thought for a few moments and wrote: It’s the light within each of our hearts – that when we say a little prayer filling our whole being with the light of Spirit, that we wish for the person we are praying for to be filled with that light, too.

I can’t help but think of the movie I was watching also while collaging this prayer box. The movie’s description of what it is about in case you’ve not seen it: On the shore of Loch Ness, Scotland, Angus (Alex Etel) finds an unusual egg. When it hatches, it releases an unexpected surprise: a water horse, the legendary creature from Scottish mythology. While the boy tries to keep its existence hidden from his mother (Emily Watson), he and his new pet, Crusoe, quickly become inseparable. But as the water horse grows larger, eventually becoming the fabled Loch Ness monster, Angus must protect his friend from those who would want to do it harm.

We’d do anything to help those we love to not suffer or come in harms way. While we can do what we can and be of support, we have to trust that this is their journey to walk as it is each of ours. And so it was with Angus, who loved that water horse he named Crusoe, with all his heart. But in the end it was for the highest good to allow Crusoe to continue his journey in his sea home that was best for him and it was that Angus could not travel with him as his  home is on land.

But it didn’t mean he didn’t love Crusoe any less — but all the more — for he loved Crusoe so much he set him free to swim the journey he was meant to.

XO,

Barb

 

No Place Like Home

No Place Like Home

As I continue to be a mentor for Oracle School, working with students in the classroom I’m assigned to, along with three other mentors, we take turns posting a question for the students to ponder to work with their oracle cards to gain deeper perspectives about their lives.

I loved today’s question from the Lead Mentor: If you could be any Wisdom of the Oracle Card, which one would you be and why?

One of my favorite cards from the Wisdom of the Oracle deck is No Place Like Home. I couldn’t help think of this one as I celebrate 34 years of marriage with John today, and it was this week five years ago that we also welcomed Gidget into our lives.

Home is my sanctuary. Being my zodiac sign is cancer and to boot my moon sign in cancer also, it can sometimes feel like a double whammy as cancer people tend to be quite sensitive. It’s something I’ve worked hard  to understand about myself and accepting that being empathetic is a gift, though at times it has felt like a curse.

And it is my home that has always been my soft place to land when life can feel sad or cruel. It’s one of my values that I hold deeply close to my heart. And my relationship with John which continues to expand and deepen in ways I would have never imagined when we met almost 40 years ago. 

The card I’d most like to continue to work on is Come to the Edge. I think of this one reflecting on the past year and how I was brought to the edge in a way I’d not expected. While it was a scary and fearful time for me earlier this year, it was coming to the edge to understand what it was about that I was granted another pivotal teaching. From that experience my sense of gratitude about life deepened once again.

I want to remember that when something is causing me angst that it’s an invitation to make a course correction in my life. It’s a signal to experience more freedom if I will just take the leap and dance with the unknown.

And how intriguing it is to me to just realize as I write this (an epiphany!) how beautiful Come to the Edge and No Place Like Home work together…

For when I am able to embrace that edge, dance with it, and discover the lessons within it, that I find my way back home again to peace and love.

Now that is magical!

XO,

Barb

 

A Gentle Nudge from Deer Spirit

A Gentle Nudge from Deer Spirit

Yesterday I shared on my Facebook page an oracle card reading I did for myself as I’ve been feeling challenged on how to support family members going through health challenges, plus just that morning learning of a dear friend’s cancer diagnoses.

When emotions run high, I can tend to get sucked into a foggy vortex, let fear take over, and want to disengage from life. There’s also this thing called control that likes to flood back in and try and take the reins and as we all know, that never works.

I woke this morning wishing I’d handled things differently as the day went on and anger of how I thought something should be handled and wasn’t.

But I also reminded myself I am human and this was a signal to take time once again in reflection and see my part in all of this that is unfolding.

Before I get to the poignant message from Deer Spirit, I begin my day with a set of cards by Mark Nepo called, The Book of Awakening. They sit on a shelf in my bathroom. Perhaps an odd place for a deck of cards, but I find it an uplifting thing to do and feed my mind with good and introspective thoughts while tinkling.  🙂

The card I pulled today: The Risk to Bloom which says, “It has always amazed and humbled me how the risk to bloom can seem so insurmountable beforehand and so inevitably freeing once the threshold of suffering is crossed.”

Big, big teaching for me this year, I thought, and smiled. And here it is again with another lesson.

Later, walking out to my writing cottage and sitting at the table where I take a few more moments in reflection, ask for guidance, pull oracle cards, and journal, before I get to the tasks at hand for the day, I asked Spirit what it was I most needed to know today? Still thinking about the events of yesterday, the card I drew was Deer Spirit – Bring a gentle touch.

I knew immediately what this was about as it was reflecting the very thing I’d been feeling all morning. While anger is part of being human, I know that I’m also a gentle person. I know that for the most part, I continue to strive to be the best I can be and approach life with grace and gentleness.

I’m reminded that each person is walking their own spiritual journey. While I was upset with how I felt someone wasn’t doing the “right” thing and causing concern with other family members (myself included) – I had a choice to not get trapped in that – but I did, and found myself spiraling into frustration.

After journaling what came up for me for a few moments, I turned to the guidebook for any other insight it might have for me. What really jumped out was, “Deer Spirit is bringing you a gentle warning that now is not the time to engage in an argument, no matter how volatile others are being. Do not match their intensity with your own. If you are dealing with an overly assertive person, step back and disengage, lest you agree to something out of alignment with your intentions.”

Whoa, there it was. While I wanted to engage yesterday with the person and how I felt something was being handled, I didn’t. Though I still had the thoughts running through my mind, which only made me feel miserable.

I thought back to The Risk to Bloom card along with Deer Spirit, and I see once again that I always have a choice to struggle or not. I also always have a choice as to how I will feel in each situation too.

This also makes me feel gratitude for the practices I have in place to bring the lessons to the forefront sooner, rather than later.

And so it is. I am humbled once again as I begin this new day to be who I believe and know I am.

XO,

Barb