Summer Nights, Friendship and Two Dogs Sleeping

Posted by Barbara Techel

chinese lanterns 1200It’s not often that John and I stay awake long enough to see the fire glowing in our chimenia after the sun has gone down. But our friend, Cassy, joined us for pizza and also enhanced our outdoor living with some Chinese Lanterns.

We just had to stay awake to see them light up and add to the ambiance of the perfect summer night once the sun put itself to sleep in the west.  Besides, being with Cassy, a young lady full of spirit and love, it’s often hard to pull ourselves away from her sweet company.

Kylie enjoyed taking in the night with all of us too and Joie was snuggled in my arms.  It was finally dark enough to turn the Chinese Lanterns on, each powered by two AAA batteries.

We all basked in the beauty of the lights and fire crackling and glowing. But most of all we soaked in all the sweet memories of the night and what our friendship means to us.  A summer breeze, a treasured friendship, and two dogs sleeping made me feel like the richest girl in the world last night. I am rich indeed.

Market Bike. One of the Joy’s of My Life.

Posted by Barbara Techel

market bike 1200I love riding my bike to the Farmer’s Market when I’m not there with my own booth selling my books.

Today was a perfect morning to hop on my bike and make the little over a mile jaunt.  I got so caught up in all the goodies that I realized as I was ready to head home I didn’t have room for my purse to fit back into the back basket!  And to top it off, I had to put the three red velvet cupcakes I bought across the street at the deli in my purse, as I ran out of room!

Fresh cut flowers, cherry tomatoes, large beefy tomato, home made pasta and salsa sauce, freshly picked radishes, spinach, and lettuce, three beautiful photography cards, hand sewn eye glass case (so I hopefully won’t keep losing my glasses!)  and a 6-inch pot of arugula and cilantro.

It was a delicate, slow ride home– but I made it!  As for the red velvet cupcakes– well, they too made it, just a little smooshed is all, which I’m sure won’t affect the delicious taste.

As much as I missed having Joie with me today, it was a good thing I didn’t because she might have had to hitch a ride with someone else!  And I also got to have a little cuddle time with a dear four legged friend of mine, Baci.  Check out my Facebook page to see our sweet photo his mom, Jodee, took of us.

Reflecting on a Year Since Frankie Died- A Celebration of her Life

Posted by Barbara Techel

frankie photo from kristiI never really said goodbye.

No goodbye because I continue to feel the love of Frankie in my heart.

No goodbye because I made the conscious choice before she died to deeply inhale the smell of her, embrace the feel of her warm, soft body, and sit with the memories of the joy and love she gave me.

No goodbye because I want every June 21st to be a celebration of Frankie’s life and all those she touched.

I honestly don’t know if I believe in the rainbow bridge. That is hard for me to share, as I realize many do. It’s not my intent to dishonor what is right for others. I understand it’s a way for many in dealing with, and moving through, their own loss. I respect that.

I believe Frankie and I are still together–she is just in a place I can’t see. But I trust she is where she needs to be–wherever that is. So I’m not sure she is waiting on the other side of a bridge.

I’m also not sure if she is really some “place”, but rather it feels as if she is  this illumination of divine light and love that makes my heart smile when I think of her. The love and light seems to come and go at just the right time when I need it.

To me, she is just here in a different way. A lighter way. A deeper way, and in many ways, a more meaningful way.

Reflecting on other pets I’ve lost, they were all hard. But Frankie’s passing was the most difficult to date I’ve experienced.

The beauty of it though?

How I’ve grown deeper in my spirituality once again, and in my own way of dealing with a profound loss.

I allowed the grief to swallow me at times. I swam in it, and almost felt as if I’d drown, feeling deeply every inch of the pain of losing her. I didn’t try to run from how bad my heart hurt. At times, it was so intense I honestly didn’t think I’d move through it. But I called upon my faith more than any other time that I can recall. I reminded myself to believe I’d find my way back to happy again.

I did. This, to me, is honoring the ultimate blessing that Frankie truly was to me– to many.

When I now feel joy, I feel it even more magnified for having moved through something I thought would crush my heart into tiny pieces.

I see now that my purpose grew even more defined. Caring for a dog that would become paralyzed was not a choice I would have made for my life. But then wanting to someday love another little one with special needs was something my soul yearned for as I moved through the years with Frankie.

The gift of Frankie, who opened my eyes to something I may never have otherwise seen.

I feel in a good place these days with Frankie at peace in a place that makes her happy. It’s no longer about her helping me, but a place that she can simply be. A place in my heart that rests easy in knowing we will always be connected in our own, unique way. A knowing that I can go on, and I am going on. That I will love again, and am loving again.

It took work for me to get here. Real work of accepting my process. Real work of allowing sadness to seep into every inch of my being. Real work of trusting I’d find joy again… even though Frankie’s physical presence is no longer here to remind me of how far I’ve come.

Reflecting back, I’d do every bit of life with Frankie all over again knowing my heart would shatter like nothing I’ve felt before.

And now… being fully present to this moment, here and now, I give my deepest gratitude for the love of Frankie who brought me to this time of now loving and caring for little Joie.

No goodbyes… only a journey that continues in just the way it is meant to be.

I. am. Blessed.

**The Life and Legacy of Frankie lives on with National Walk ‘N Roll Dog Day.  Join us on Facebook to continue to spread the positive message that dogs in wheelchair live quality lives if given a chance.