self-love

My Memoir I’m Fine Just the Way I Am – Now Available as E-Book!

Posted by Barbara Techel

I want to first take a moment to thank those who hung in there and ordered a paperback copy of my new memoir even though the shipping time was longer than usual or perhaps you are still waiting for your copy to arrive. Thank you, thank you, and thanks so much for your patience! 

I’m happy to share that my memoir is now also available as an e-book through Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Smashwords.

A recent review…thank you, Cynthia!

This is a courageous story of a woman’s deepening into her soul’s truth. While it’s very specific, it’s also a universal story. How do we find the courage to be our true selves? How do we love another without sacrificing our well-being? How do we find our way from our spiritual center and not from the ego?

Barb tells the story of her dog, Gidget, and the tough decisions she had to make in their life together. She pulls on resources she knew were available and discovered new support systems.

An easy to read, inspiring story that gives a sense of what’s possible when we connect with what’s true within us.

~Cynthia Morris, Writer’s Coach and author of The Busy Woman’s Guide to Writing a World-Changing Book

Thank you again for your support of my writing and work. It means so much!

xo,

Barbara

Heart Burst Moment from One Little Girl to Another

Posted by Barbara Techel
Me at six months old

While eggs boiled on my stove earlier this afternoon, I watched out my kitchen window as a mom and her little girl walked down the street toward the park. Even though it’s a blustery and chilly day, the little girl didn’t seem to notice.

The mom stopped to take her hands out of her pocket and draw in the strings on her hood tighter, while the little girl skipped and bounced happily ahead. I noticed then that the mom was carrying a large clear plastic bag and the little girl was picking up litter and putting it inside the bag.

I thought about how that little girl not affected by the cold was also perhaps not likely as deeply affected by the happenings in our world as she took delight in what she was doing.

My heart then burst open for the sheer joy she was exuding as well as wanting more than anything for her little heart to never experience pain or sorrow.

And as I watched her it came to me once again that we can make a choice to live with joy in any given moment just like that little girl picking up trash and no matter what is transpiring in the world around us.

As I searched for a photo of a little girl skipping to share with this post I couldn’t find one. This led me to wonder if I had a photo of myself as a little girl skipping. While I found many happy pictures of me, I didn’t find this particular one.

But I did see this one of me at six months old. Looking at the photo of myself I felt that same burst in my heart and tears filled my eyes.

In my book, I’m Fine Just the Way I Am I share the experience I had in the winter of 2018 when I had a healing session with a transformational breathwork practitioner. As the session was winding down and I was in resting mode I saw in my mind’s eye myself at six months old. It was in that moment I felt this surge of loving energy wrap itself around me and I knew without a doubt that I’d always been loved and that I was worthy just as I was.

All the doubts and fear I’d carried with me for fifty-some years had melted away in an instant at that moment. I never felt so safe or protected. It’s not that my parents didn’t care for me and love me, as they did, and I’m very blessed in that way.

But it was the experience of my childhood wounding from being touched inappropriately as a young girl that took that away from me. It instilled within me this shame and pain and feeling of unworthiness that followed me throughout my life.

As I’ve done the inner work over the years to heal that wound one of the gifts I believe from it is that it has helped me to be the optimistic person I am today. Despite that wounding experience, I made the choice to find joy where I could and try to look for the positive in many situations.

And that little girl bouncing down the road was a reflection of me and of all of us, really. We have all experienced some degree of pain in our lives and it is just part of this human experience. Though I’d love for that little girl I saw to not feel heartache or pain in her life, I know that it isn’t possible.

But what I would tell her is that she can still make the choice to thrive and find joy no matter what.

xo,

Barbara

 

 

Simple Tasks Guide Us into the Natural Rhythm of Life and Create More Peace

Posted by Barbara Techel

The question I asked for all of us this week: What is it we need to know as we continue to pause in this time of unknown right now?

Chop Wood #42: How symbolic to see the broom on the card with the buckets as we are all being encouraged to continue to sweep away what we no longer need. We’ve had a few weeks now of following the ‘safer at home, sheltering in place’ and being with a myriad of feelings that have come to the surface. This may also include areas of our homes we are quite literally going through, cleaning out, and getting rid of what we no longer need.

While we can’t control what is going on in the outside world, we can continue to do what we can within our own spaces of our homes and minds. “Chop wood, carry water” is a saying I’m sure you’ve heard of. While it may seem tedious at times and we may find ourselves vacillating back to wanting ‘more’ this is an opportunity to pause and shift our perspective because we have nowhere to be right now. 

It’s these simple tasks we practice that will continue to help ground and center us. As we ‘chop wood’ not only will we feel lighter in spirit within the current moment and what is right here, right now, but it is also what we can then take with us as we move into a new world— which is still unknown right now. In other words, this time of pausing, learning to be with all that is coming up for us, then hopefully finding your way back to peace, is something we will come to see as a gift and how fluid life is and how so much of what we perceive as a struggle or the unknown is really just temporary. “This too shall pass.” We are learning to go with the flow even more now.

This line from the guidebook jumped out at me: “There are times when the big dream is meant to lie dormant in your consciousness so that you can pay attention to simple chores in your life.”

When I pulled the Chop Wood card I actually sighed and my body melted into my chair. There really is nothing else for us to do right now, but be with and care for what is right in front of us, which includes our inner world, and what is around us within our homes. This is what carries us to the next step – whatever and whenever that will be.

I know the reason I moved into feeling peace is because of my love of home has always been a value of mine. I love to tinker around my house, creating a cozy and sanctuary-like atmosphere. I enjoy the feeling I get after cleaning a room also – though there are times I dread having to do it – but then the feeling I experience after I’m complete makes me coming back for more. There is really something so satisfying in it.

My inner world is also something I’ve learned to appreciate and nourish over the years. The more I do, the more I find I can flow through uncertain times with more ease.

The animal guiding us as we continue to ‘chop wood’ is Octopus. When I think about Octopus I’ve always marveled at the beautiful fluidity of which they move through the water. The way all their tentacles seem to effortlessly glide through the water is so mesmerizing and calming to me – such an exquisite dance to witness.

We may not know where we are going or what all of this is about right now, but we can still participate in the dance of life by learning new ways in which we move through our days.

I appreciate the words on the card of ‘calm clarity, control over emotions, and self-compassion.’ The fact that we’ve all had to put many parts of our life on hold – or what we knew of life to be before the virus – if we are open to it and not struggling against it – we can discover and feel into the fact that this is what can actually guide us each into a more peaceful place within ourselves.

As emotions arise for each of us we each have the choice to practice self-compassion instead of perhaps falling back into old patterns of berating ourselves for thinking things should be different or judging ourselves for what we think we could have done differently.

We are truly all in this together. The more we can each be with what is coming up for us individually, working through it, and integrating it, not only will we be better off for ourselves, but for those around us. That self-compassion we practice floods our hearts with understanding and love, which then helps us to extend that outward to others.

Much love and peace to you this week.

xo,

Barbara

One-to-one intuitive guidance sessions available here.

Cards used: Wisdom of the Oracle by Colette Baron-Reid and The Ark Animal Tarot and Oracle by Bernadette King